Why Do Men play Head games? - Love Forum

Amyejean · #1 (**permalink**) 30-08-04, 09:28 PM

I really don't understand why men think that certin things are funny. I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 yrs. He mentioned Saturday night he wanted to go engagement ring shopping, I was kinda surprised, but didn't want to get my hopes up. But sunday morning he kept talking about it, so I was getting excited. We drove around for a few hours just enjoying the sun, finally we both retuned home, without ring shopping. I happened to mention something about shopping maybe to see what was going on, and he looked at me laughted and said " You didn't think I was serious did you"
It crushed me, I should have known better than to get my hopes up. But that is not a very good joke to play on a girl, cause Girls dream of their wedding since they were like 5 yrs old. When he said that, I felt my heart rip in two. Hurt so bad.

Grrrrrr

LucidDream · #2 (**permalink**) 30-08-04, 09:35 PM

Sometimes lines like "You didn't think I was serious did you" are when people regret what they said earlyer because they are too embaressed now. When you suprise people (by asking about the shoping again) they have to think quickly, and sometimes their rushed reply can sound a little harsh and defencive.
If you think that marrage is a possibility, then perhaps he actualy was thinking about engagement ring shopping, but was to shy to admit it when you asked about it later on.

Perhaps he is seriousoly thinking about it.
Perhaps he is a little curious.
Or perhaps he just did it for some kinda joke.

Elysium · #3 (**permalink**) 30-08-04, 09:39 PM

If you guys have been going out for that long, then hopefully you are comfortable enough with each other that you could talk to him, and tell him how huirtful it is to you, for him to make comments like that. He should know better. The only reason I can think of why he would say something like that is what Lucid said, that he's embarrassed for saying it earlier. But none of us know him - I think you should talk to him about it. Good luck

nebulachich · #4 (**permalink**) 31-08-04, 02:39 AM

I agree with Elysium.. but as far as.. "he's embarrassed for saying it earlier". This obviously show the guy talks out his ass (like so many others). You should have smacked him if you ask me!!!

zas · #5 (**permalink**) 31-08-04, 04:37 AM

asshole, give him the silent treatment

squirrley · #6 (**permalink**) 31-08-04, 04:55 AM

Thats just down right cruel. Honestly, Id be very hurt by that. ESEPCIALLY knowing youve been together for 2 years and its a REAL option for you. Id tell him how that made you feel. That just sucks he did that to you. That right there was some serious head games, and theres NO excuse for it. You dont screw around with something that important. I dont care if he's embarrassed by it or not, that was bullshit to screw with your head.

BillyGalbreath · #7 (**permalink**) 31-08-04, 04:56 AM

Guys like him is what keep me single. They promise the world, and never give it. And I promise the world, with all intensions to give it, and they laugh and walk away thinking I am going to never give. Guys like your b/f or whatever piss me off to no end. THEY are the reason guys like me, "the nice guy", are still single.

Don't say what you don't mean. <-- One of my sayings that I will live by til the day I die.

LucidDream · #8 (**permalink**) 31-08-04, 07:28 AM

even a nice guy can look like an asshole when put under pressure

GBRaul · #9 (**permalink**) 31-08-04, 06:50 PM

Nice guys usually look like assholes under pressure. After all, they are nice guys and usually nice guys do not have the most glib tongues. Thus, under pressure, they'd just spurt any crap they can find in their mind at that point in time and end up screwing everything up.

Oh yes, back to topic. Talk to him about it.

LucidDream · #10 (**permalink**) 01-09-04, 02:30 AM

Thats the point im making, he could be a nice guy, but you caught him off guard so he "just spurt any crap he could find in his mind at that point in time and end up screwing everything up."

But I dont know the guy, its in my nature to asume that people had the best intentions, but I could very well be wrong and he is just a jeark.
You are the only one who knows him well enough to tell which one it is.

Breezy18 · #11 (**permalink**) 01-09-04, 11:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BillyGalbreath

Don't say what you don't mean

or better yet, say what you mean, and mean what you say!!

Yes, Amy, I concur with everyone. That was a cruel and hurtful thing to do, especially given the amount of time you two have been together. Sorry to disagree with Lucid, cause his opinion has come to mean a great deal to me, but how could your b/f be caught off guard when it was all his idea?? It just doesn't make sense. You definately should talk to him. I hope it works out.

webfish · #12 (**permalink**) 01-09-04, 02:05 PM

it's not men as a whole, it's the person. Women can play lot's of head games too, but still it is just the individual. Either sex there is plenty of them. I have had my share of women that play head games, I just dump them and find someone else who doesn't play head games. An individual trait is all it is and has nothing to do with the sex of the individual

Kermy · #13 (**permalink**) 01-09-04, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BillyGalbreath

Don't say what you don't mean. <-- One of my sayings that I will live by til the day I die.

Way to go dude! I live by something of the similar too! I hate people who break promises or says one thing and does the exact opposite.

LucidDream · #14 (**permalink**) 02-09-04, 07:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Breezy18

Sorry to disagree with Lucid, cause his opinion has come to mean a great deal to me

Thanks Breezy, that means alot to me

Breezy18 · #15 (**permalink**) 02-09-04, 09:10 AM

you are most welcome.