Dating a friend but other friends are pissed - Love Forum

kvnband · #1 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 01:26 AM

OK, I am a guy who is best friends with 3 girls. (No I'm not gay, they're just fun to be around).

Last night I asked one of the friends out. She said yes. Now the other 2 are saying that they only have each other left. They are pissed, and I have yet to find out why. I keep asking why they can't just be happy for us, because we both have something that we want. I honest to God have tried everything, and I cannot reason with them...I know they are going to try to tear the relationship apart on Monday, and I don't want that to happen, as I think this girl is "the one".

I really need some advice on what to say. It's tearing me up inside to have my so called friends acting like this.

Thank you

Frebbiezadyke · #2 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 03:12 AM

hmmm id say they are jelouse and might be afriad that u wont pay as much time and attention with them

kvnband · #3 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 03:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frebbiezadyke

hmmm id say they are jelouse and might be afriad that u wont pay as much time and attention with them

Exactly. I have tried to tell them time and time again that it won't be like that, but they refuse to listen. Luckily, the girl I'm dating (I just talked to her about 2 minutes ago) has basically said that this is crap, and she will stay with me no matter what. So at least I know they won't tear us apart.

zas · #4 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 04:09 AM

are you prepared to loose these "friends" because you want to be with this girl? i'd go with yes if i were you, some friends they are...they could at least be glad that you'll both be happy together.

kvnband · #5 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 04:21 AM

We discussed this before we told them. We knew what their reaction would be, and we decided that we would try not to give each other up because of them...Eventually they will get over it. I am totally prepared to lose these people for this girl. I totally and fully feel that she is the 'one'.

zas · #6 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 04:31 AM

thats good, they dont sound like realy friends to me. they say gf's come and go but your friends will always be there...it looks to me as if yours wont! and friends come and go aswell, whats the point in trying to be friends with people like that?

kvnband · #7 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 04:35 AM

They are friends..that's the thing, we are all very close. I'm hoping that they just have some jealousy or something, and that they will get over it, because I would hate to lose a friendship of crap like this.

crEA-tEch · #8 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 05:58 AM

I'll just re-iterate what's been said... there's no other explanation really, apart from jealousy.

The 2 girls feel like you've wrecked the circle of friends, which is only true if they LET it be ruined. True, things wont be the same.. but if they were true friends, they'd get over it and adjust to the changes.

Talk to them both individually and explain the situation to them, don't get them together as they'll back eachother up and you won't have a chance.

If you still cant reason with them like that, then you've just got to leave it up to them if they want to accept it.. you cant force acceptation on them.

Hope this helps,
Nick

kvnband · #9 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 06:36 AM

crEA-tEch, your post has clarified the whole situation. I truly think that they will get over it eventually, but it'll take some getting used to for them.

crEA-tEch · #10 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 06:41 AM

It's ok kvnband, glad to help =)

Hope everything turns out ok and they can see you're both happy, I'm sure you are.

Good luck with the relationship,
Nick

KirstyM · #11 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 10:50 AM

I would just get on with things - actions speak louder than words and if they realise everything is how it was before and your relationship hasnt affected the friend circle then theyll accept the relationship.

kvnband · #12 (**permalink**) 19-09-04, 10:51 AM

Thank you all for the help. I will report back here Monday evening to tell everyone how it went.

Thank you.