Should I ask out a friend? - Love Forum

ShafferNY · #1 (**permalink**) 13-12-04, 02:26 PM

I've been good friends with this girl for about a year now. I feel like I keep getting mixed messages from her. I really like her but I don't know if I should ask her out or not. I'm really split right down the middle on this one. I don't want to lose her friendship, but I think about her all the time. What should I do?

Nice Lover Boy · #2 (**permalink**) 13-12-04, 03:32 PM

Don't ask her out, Dumbass! Can you see that friends can't go out with friends? It just doesn't work. Read my threads in the dating colum and you'll see what I'm talking about. I bet if you ask her out, you'll end up posting again for help and that your in crisis of heart failure. Trust me, don't do it. Oh, what the hell, I'm in denial and bitter.

Steve2004 · #3 (**permalink**) 13-12-04, 04:02 PM

..i know..a lot of friends..that go out with friends..if anything that could make the relationship stronger....and the only reason your friendship would get ****ed up if you two broke up..is if you two were being two immature babies about the whole thing.

so i say go for it

hotfudgemoney · #4 (**permalink**) 14-12-04, 08:44 AM

I'd say go for it too.

misombra · #5 (**permalink**) 14-12-04, 09:05 AM

yeah. you'll just be better friends. friends that have sex and drive each other crazy.

isn't that what you want?

monkey · #6 (**permalink**) 14-12-04, 10:20 AM

Just start hanging out with her more in groups and alone. see what happens.

ltj5253 · #7 (**permalink**) 14-12-04, 12:17 PM

should you ask her out? sure if you want to get fukd over. you should know better than that. friends means no sex whatsover. end of story. or she might say sure, and then youll get to spend tons of money for friendship dates, if thats what you want, go for it. and all your going to get out of these friendship dates is a suttle hug and a peck on the cheek, and like i said if thats what you want, then go for it. best bet would be to just enjoy being friends and find someone else to get involved with. friends are a bad choice.

hotfudgemoney · #8 (**permalink**) 14-12-04, 12:37 PM

You're very anti-friends to sex aren't you?

monkey · #9 (**permalink**) 14-12-04, 02:54 PM

well the question is do you believe in the http://www.laddertheory.com/ or not. I have a friend that just about basis his life around that.

idontknow · #10 (**permalink**) 15-12-04, 05:46 AM

Well I've had the same problem buddy and mho is that if you really like a friend (have fallen in love with her) you should take your chances and see how she feels about you. I can't be friends with a girl I like, if I know there will never be anything else but friendship. If she falls in love with someone else and starts dating another guy, are you gonna pretend that you're happy for her? Hell I won't! Just imagine what it will feel like if she comes to you and tells you how wonderful this guy is. I'll be gnawing my teeth. As I said in the beginning this is only my opinion on the matter, but I suppose you have the following options:

A. Tell the girl how you feel and who knows, she might feel the same way. If she doesn't feel the same way, talk to her about the mixed messages she's sending out and if you feel that she isn't being honest, give her the finger and show her the door.

B. Stay friends with her and hope you meet someone else that will make the feelings you have for her, go away.

C. Stay friends with the girl and fall asleep every night thinking about her.

I'd say start with option A. If she doesn't feel the same way about you, you can try option B.

hotfudgemoney · #11 (**permalink**) 15-12-04, 06:34 AM

Yea... I vote for A. without the give her the finger and show her the door part. I am in the exact situation that you listed above A B and C. She has a boy friend, and lost as to what to do about it. I can't stop thinking about her tho.

Steve2004 · #12 (**permalink**) 15-12-04, 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ltj5253

should you ask her out? sure if you want to get fukd over. you should know better than that. friends means no sex whatsover. end of story. or she might say sure, and then youll get to spend tons of money for friendship dates, if thats what you want, go for it. and all your going to get out of these friendship dates is a suttle hug and a peck on the cheek, and like i said if thats what you want, then go for it. best bet would be to just enjoy being friends and find someone else to get involved with. friends are a bad choice.

now..are you just going by your own personal experiences? i wouldn't like to think that this is just your bitterness getting in the way of giving good advice. :/