saying i love you - Love Forum

shimmer5 · #1 (**permalink**) 24-12-04, 09:32 AM

im just curious but how long into your relationship did you wait to say "i love you". im 22. ive dated guys in the past who said i love you quickly (a couple weeks i guess) and the relationships all ended horribly with them dumping me after a month or 2. i said it back to them and now thinking on it, i didnt mean it (horrible i know) i thought i did but i got over each of them. my current relationship is at 4 months and we havent said it. there have been times when i had to hold it inside when he was looking in my eyes and asking me what i was thinking and i wanted to tell him it because i mean it this time for the first time ever.. <3

Frasbee · #2 (**permalink**) 24-12-04, 10:59 AM

Make him say it, make him beg for you, make him give up everything so you can lead him around by a leash.

IKnowEverything · #3 (**permalink**) 24-12-04, 11:06 AM

Those words usually leave my mouth 5 mins before I expect some sex.

Slipknott · #4 (**permalink**) 24-12-04, 12:02 PM

If you really love him then tell him! Find out what he is thinking....I told my 'gf' i loved her even that we never ever hung out and she was a bitch about things and blowing me off like a motha ****er....So let him know what your thinking! Who cares? If anything, he will say it back. Who knows, he might even mean it.
But dont let this build up inside of you only to destroy your thoughts. Your gunna die someday just like everyone else so i kinda live like 'who cares, as long as its right and not evil'....lol.

Frasbee · #5 (**permalink**) 24-12-04, 03:16 PM

That depends on your perception of what is good and what is evil...

#6 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 02:45 AM

took my ass 6 months into a relationship and now we're almost at 10

jan 4 = 10 months <3333333

blackiesharley · #7 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 03:00 AM

Saying that really scares me, as does hearing it as it implies so many things, a relationship, a future, etc.

But.... when things feel SO right and all is good, it's hard to not say it or not to enjoy hearing it.

Laguna · #8 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 04:09 AM

The relationship i'm in now, it took me about 2 weeks. But, I really am in love with her, it's the first time i've said it to a girl and I doubt I would say it unless I meant it ever in my life.

Fawn · #9 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 04:22 AM

I said those 3 little words at 4 months. We just got home from a wedding and I started to cry. I told him and I was dissappointed to find out he couldn't say the words back. About a month ago he finally said it and meant it. It means so much to me when I here him say it now! Its been 9 1/2 months.

#10 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 07:04 AM

dang. i said it first and she was a ****ing bitch about it. she teased me 3 times. the 1st time i said it she was like "listen i don't think i can say it back.." i was ****in' pissed dude. 3 times she said "hey i think i'm in love with you" and i was all happy but then after each time she goes "no i'm not.." i was so hurt. then, the 4th time i literally said "shut the **** up" lol 3-4 months later it hasn't turned out to be fake

i'm so happyyyyy that she really means it. cuz now she's scared to death that i'm gonna leave her.. poor thing. she literally depends on me to be happy. if i left her she'd be lost dude.

sfalexi · #11 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 08:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by iknoweverything

Those words usually leave my mouth 5 mins before I expect some sex.

And surprisingly enough, it still works in today's world. You'd think women would have caught on by now.

I'm not saying that THAT'S why these guys said it to you after a few weeks or not, but it very well could be for some of them.

As for me, never said to anyone in my life. Don't even say it to my parents. The only person that gets an "I love you" is my grandma and my little sister. And even then they are few and far between.

Relationship-wise and time-wise like you're asking, I was in a 13 month long relationship without ever saying it.

Alexi

squirrley · #12 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 09:56 AM

I wouldnt say it unless I truly meant it. And wow, what a ton of bricks that were just dropped on me, to read someone say as soon as you say that it implies all these other things, but for me, at the time, I didnt expect it back, I couldnt hold it in any longer. Not that it was killing me, but I was so filled with so much happiness it makes me smile just thinking about that day. NOW~I see the impact it has on the other person. Knowing they're not ready for it, and I certainly didnt think or intend to imply that I wanted or was even ready for all these other things. That was NOT my intention, but to share those intimate feelings that just dont seem to come along that often, and when they do...for me its been a rarity. It took me 7 months, and even then I didnt want to say anything, wanted to hold out, a couple of times I wanted to, but didnt. Then one day I just knew in my heart it was time and I said it! Not for fear but didnt want to rock the boat. And I "think" I did, but I have no regrets. I wouldnt change it.

I wouldnt take back that moment for anything. My heart, my mind, my soul, everything at that moment I just knew...it was right for me. Who knows what will happen now, but in the meantime, no one can take that day from me. It was a breaking point in my life, one that I thought I would never experience again.

blue · #13 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 12:27 PM

whne the time is right you will know u can feel it in your heart, for me it was something that i felt for a long time but just could not say but there were certain moments that i was just bursting with so much love that i said a few times but then one day just doing something so normal a came out! i could no longer hold it! its a risk and its scary because you dont know for sure if the same feelings will be returned. for me fortunatley they were. Its hard to be vulnerable but i think like squirt said above its a risk and no matter what there should be no regrets. in love you just never know

DarkNeko · #14 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 01:44 PM

My boyfriend first said he loved me about 9 months into the relationship...but you see, he was my first boyfriend, and he was forced to be very patient with me; he admitted he had wanted to say it for a long time, but he didn't want to upset me, and make me think he was only saying it for the sake of having his carnal desires fulfilled.

But now, as I enter a zone of turbulent rifts in the relationship, those words have lost their emotional power; I sadly do not feel my heart is in my voice when I tell him that I love him...cursed emotions. Love sucks, does it not?

.........

But anyway, as people have said, if it is YOU that wants t say it, then do it when your heart says you're ready. You don't have to wait; if you're nervous about making that move, that is understandable. My boyfriend made all the moves because I wasn't sure what he wanted.

...........

Darkneko - a fool formerly in love

emanresu · #15 (**permalink**) 26-12-04, 02:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frasbee

Make him say it, make him beg for you, make him give up everything so you can lead him around by a leash.

This seems unwise. HE will find you are doing this and it could end horribly yet again. Know youself and your feelings the best you can. Don not be a fool, but do not assume he is either. Respect what is respectable in him and do not be afraid to tell him. Be honest with him and with yourself. He will respect you more for it, and will respect you as you respect yourself. If he does not, you may wish to fairly evaluate why. If you cannot come to a conclusion that there may be a way to improve yourself, he may not be worth your love.