why does this bother me so much? - Love Forum

guan · #1 (**permalink**) 10-06-03, 11:19 AM

ok, I've been in this relationship with my girlfriend for about 6 months now. I am 22 years old and before this relationship I was a virgin, I had barely even messed around with any girls before. Anyway, my girlfriend has slept with two other guys. One of them was in a long term relationship and the other was a one night stand in Cancun. Well, we've been having sex for a long time now and her one night stand is really starting to bother me. It really doesn't bother me much that she slept with a guy in a long term relationship but the other one bugs the shit out of me. It keeps me awake some nights. I brought it up to her once and she seemed to get angry and said we have "different standards". Should this be bugging me as much as it is or should I just let it go?

Illusional · #2 (**permalink**) 10-06-03, 12:53 PM

of course this will bother you, BUT remember that her past is HER past and should be left there. you shouldn't be worrying about what she did because it will only cause more problems in the future. i think if anything, you should be worrying more so if she caught anything during the one night stand. if she's clean, then there is nothing more to worry about. raverboy

ViSionS · #3 (**permalink**) 10-06-03, 01:12 PM

I can only speak from experience. Let it go. I decided to press that issue with a girlfriend once when was about 20, and that was the beginning of the end of that relationship. The funny thing is, as I got a little older and had a one night stand or two of my own, I totally got where she was coming from, and it's never bothered me since. Now I'm not saying go have a one night stand so you can get over this, in fact it's not a real healthy practice anyway. Just take my word for it, it isn't a big deal if someone has had one or two in their life, it just proves they are human, and the fact that she was honest and told you about it, should be an indicator to you about where you stand with her, right here, right now, when and where it realy counts. The past is the past, concentrate on the now, and life will be a lot easier.

Again, just my $0.02.
ViSionS

giggles · #4 (**permalink**) 12-06-03, 07:21 PM

well, they said it already. let it go. past is past. but don't try sooo hard to forget it..let it go unforgotten, soon you'll forget it. if it bothers you, try thinking about something else...something beautiful about your gf. you will only make things worse or even make her do something stupid should you keep on reminding her about the issue.