How can I turn a friendship into something more?

[Kane040]

Hey everyone, I'm 17 years old and I had the horrible luck of falling in love with my best friend. I started hanging out with her almost a year ago after she got out of a very serious relationship (which by the way spawned from her and her best friend getting together). Since then she's had 3 boyfriends who never treated her as good as I do. She's somewhat of a flurt and it drives me nuts when I see her with other guys. I've tried to find out what kind of guy she likes but I cant seem to pin it down. She knows how strongly I feel about her, but it doesnt even seem like she'll give me a chance. No matter what I do she wont go out with me, and it seems the more I try the more immune she gets. I hang out with her every day, and try to make her as happy as I can and do so much for her, but I fear that every day that goes by, the more the friendship sets in. Can anyone offer some advice that can help me get out of this situation? I'm willing to try anything because it wont affect our friendship. I have great patience but she'll be moving in almost another year and it seems like im running out of time. Help would be greatly appreciated.

[prelude01]

Its terrible but, you've gone down the friendship track. Although if you really want to know what the situation is between you both just got to ask. Remember don't be in shock of the answer cause you probably know it already. You need to find another love interest. I know its difficult sometimes cause all you might see is this one person. I know I've been there before. What can help you out is try talking with other girls you'll soon see that there are others that you have interests in. Just remember before it gets to the point of friendship let your intentions be known early. Take for instance point of friendship would be where you hang out regularly and do activites together better to quit before that point. Keep your distance at being someone you see once in a while like at the bar or local hang out like an aquantice. Don't hesitate after a few meetings to ask for their number and to have and outting with them. Then you can see from there where you can take this growing relationship. Its just my opinion. Peace out!

[Frasbee]

Are you a homosexual?

Anyway, I would say you're treadin' across hazardous terrain. I mean, it's not like you guys went out on a date, and then put you on the "just a friend" list. You're already on the "just a friend" list. And unless she shares similar feelings, you're riskin' the complete and utter annihilation of this relationship if you were to confront her with these feelings.

Is it worth the risk?

Your call.

Bleh, I smell fish...

[Kane040]

Prelude, thanks for the advice, I'll keep it in mind.
Frasbee, No im not homosexual, and I have already confronted her with these feelings and didnt suffer "complete and utter annihilation".

[Frasbee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kane040

Prelude, thanks for the advice, I'll keep it in mind.
Frasbee, No im not homosexual, and I have already confronted her with these feelings and didnt suffer "complete and utter annihilation".

Sorry 'bout the homosexual thing, no hard feelings?

And I just really wanted to use the term you quoted. "complete and utter annihilation".

But in all seriousness, I find tryin' to get with the best friend to be a very sticky situation and best be avoided...but it looks like you're past that. In which case I don't have any useful advice to offer.

Good luck!

[Kane040]

Thanks anyways. Anyone else have any ideas?

[jimbob]

Ouch.

God it sucks when that happens. But I suppose it's not quite as bad when she fancies you as well (as in my case).

Yup, fallin in love with your best friend for four years sucks a lot of dick.

I suggest you don't make a big thing about it, seem relaxed and if it doesn't work it doesn't work. Let it come naturally...