ok ok ok ....a serious thread by me.

[Only-virgins]

All through high school I have been obsessed, infatuated, in love, lusting for, call it what you will for this girl. I never talked to her do to me being chicken shit ( plus I though she was out of my league and her friends hated me). It has been 4 years after high school and I still cant get over her(seriously ). I still think about her. Not to long ago I found out were she lives....what should I do? Maybe ring her door bell and be like "BAM! ITS ME!"? no seriously though...Would sending apology flowers with a apology note for being a dumbass(I know she liked me too)be ok? or would that freak her out ?

I think she thought I was stupid but I do not think I even did much or give to many reasons for that.

[igor]

Try calling her instead. If she doesn't know that you know where she lives, then it might seem a little bit stalker-like to just show up. The flowers might work too.

[Only-virgins]

Quote:

Originally Posted by igor

Try calling her instead. If she doesn't know that you know where she lives, then it might seem a little bit stalker-like to just show up. The flowers might work too.

You think the flowers might work? I mean if she has life thats fine....I just want to say I am sorry. I don't have her number ...I just know were she lives..we are not really friends you know or anything of that matter

[Illusional]

i'm guessing that this girl still IS a virgin??

alright, back to reality. you're still obsessing over a girl that you've had a crush what?? 4 years ago?? imagine if i newbie posted this, what would you have to say? alright i think i'm done being mean now.

since you can't let go of out,... lemme get something straight. the two of you had an interest in one another and you didn't act upon it? hrmm.. honestly i don't think that she's still head over heals for you. she might still think that you're cute and if she's single she might reconsidering her feelings that she once had for you, but 4 years is a long time ago. bottom line, unless she's single, i wouldn't bother making an effort.

raverboy

[Only-virgins]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Illusional

i'm guessing that this girl still IS a virgin??

alright, back to reality. you're still obsessing over a girl that you've had a crush what?? 4 years ago?? imagine if i newbie posted this, what would you have to say? alright i think i'm done being mean now.

since you can't let go of out,... lemme get something straight. the two of you had an interest in one another and you didn't act upon it? hrmm.. honestly i don't think that she's still head over heals for you. she might still think that you're cute and if she's single she might reconsidering her feelings that she once had for you, but 4 years is a long time ago. bottom line, unless she's single, i wouldn't bother making an effort.

raverboy

Well I know she is not a virgin because she went on a spree to make me jealous through high-school because I wouldnt say anything(hence forth my hate for non-virgins). I understand everything you are saying and I know its hard to believe but I really can not get over her. Its not that simple. She probably dont give a shit for me anymore but I think I would maybe just rest in piece if she knew how I felt then and now. I am gratefull that you did not consider me a newbie though . She probably isnt head over heals for me either . I have no way of knowing if she is single or not....Not much advice there..thanks anyways though ...You think I should do something ? any advice?

Do you have any mutual friends? Try to arrange for a small group outing where you can speak w/her in a non-pressure environment. Get her attention and then drop an easy apology "BTW, remember when...? Sorry, i was really ____ & I wanted to let you know that I think _______" etc. See what evolves.

You could always just try asking her out for coffee or something direct. In person is always best. You can read her body language and shows you've got some moxie. The flowers seem a little overdone, given the timespan, unless you really did something stupid/mean to her. Depends on her maturity. Is she dating anyone? I have other ideas, but so much depends on her personality...

DON'T immediately tell her you've been thinking of her all this time. There's nothing wrong w/it, of course, but many people would be weirded out. Especially since there isn't much history b/t you...?

If all else fails, try this: http://www.sharpman.com/Article.asp?ArticleID=128

Hope this helps.

[Only-virgins]

Quote:

Originally Posted by indigosoul

Do you have any mutual friends? Try to arrange for a small group outing where you can speak w/her in a non-pressure environment. Get her attention and then drop an easy apology "BTW, remember when...? Sorry, i was really ____ & I wanted to let you know that I think _______" etc. See what evolves.

You could always just try asking her out for coffee or something direct. In person is always best. You can read her body language and shows you've got some moxie. The flowers seem a little overdone, given the timespan, unless you really did something stupid/mean to her. Depends on her maturity. Is she dating anyone? I have other ideas, but so much depends on her personality...

DON'T immediately tell her you've been thinking of her all this time. There's nothing wrong w/it, of course, but many people would be weirded out. Especially since there isn't much history b/t you...?

If all else fails, try this: http://www.sharpman.com/Article.asp?ArticleID=128

Hope this helps.

Thanks for the advice but I just don't know if those problems on that site are the ones I have. I have no mutual friends with her (remember me saying above that her friends hate me?). I used to be shy and not approach her but I have changed...I think the problem now is the time...its been over 4 years since high-school and 2 since I have even seen her . My mind just won't let her go. I am afraid now that she might just freak out that I have still been thinking of her if she moved on. I don't want to come out like a stalker...I do not even know of a way to see her let alone ask her for coffee...All I know is were she lives now lol.

[doll69]

I have an idea. Since you know where she lives, why don't try hang round that place and see if you can bump into her. Definitely start up a conversation, and I think you can tell a lot from her body language there.

[Dibididamn]

hey ov, I think sending flowers/showing up on her doorstep
is a bit too much and she will most probably freak out and
get a restraining order against you.

So, stalk her. Wait outside her house and when she comes out
'accidentally' bump into her, and act surprised. Invite her for a coffee - get her
number/email if going out isn't possible.
This might end up with you succeeding or being noticed and ending up in jail.

Well, thats the best I could come up with
Gud LaK.

[Chlorine]

Only-Virgins----Four years on, all you have of her are ideas derived from impressions of her from four years back. You have an idea of this girl which isn't based on anything current. Four years on, she may not be the same as how you imagine her to be.

Come back down to earth.

[misombra]

4 years is a bit of time. plus she's a non virgin, which makes me think, "why would he even bother?"

but if you want to get in touch with her then send her a letter. that way you don't have to see her and she's not completely obligated to write you back...

[Kiechi]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Only-virgins

All through high school I have been obsessed, infatuated, in love, lusting for, call it what you will for this girl. I never talked to her do to me being chicken shit ( plus I though she was out of my league and her friends hated me). It has been 4 years after high school and I still cant get over her(seriously ). I still think about her. Not to long ago I found out were she lives....what should I do? Maybe ring her door bell and be like "BAM! ITS ME!"? no seriously though...Would sending apology flowers with a apology note for being a dumbass(I know she liked me too)be ok? or would that freak her out ?

I think she thought I was stupid but I do not think I even did much or give to many reasons for that.

If you ask me, whatever your "sorry" for, I assume she has forgotten.

[Kiechi]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dibididamn

hey ov, I think sending flowers/showing up on her doorstep
is a bit too much and she will most probably freak out and
get a restraining order against you.

So, stalk her. Wait outside her house and when she comes out
'accidentally' bump into her, and act surprised. Invite her for a coffee - get her
number/email if going out isn't possible.
This might end up with you succeeding or being noticed and ending up in jail.

Well, thats the best I could come up with
Gud LaK.

I thought you were too "cool" for this forum eh?

[artyemi]

Hey, I think you should go for that stopping by her house thing. It's creepy, sure. scary, obsessive, umm, whatever. But if you don't do it, then you'll never know for sure. Tell her you stopped by to see a friend around the area or something, and that you remembered she lived around there and figured that you'd stop by for a visit.

[Frasbee]

Wow Gordon, I think you're overdosing on emoticons.