Really like a girl(she doesnt know me). Help - Love Forum

Blaze · #1 (**permalink**) 08-04-05, 03:50 AM

Hi, im new at the forums. Having a small(or big) problem that i hope someone might give me some help with...

Ok, here's the deal. I'm 20 years old, and go to high school(dunno if high school is the same in Norway as in USA) the final year. It's already been like 8 months of the school-year, not much left. I've had kind of a distance-crush on a girl(she's 17 years old, the first year, i don't know her though) almost all the time, but have never ever done anythink more than look at her. For the 2 past months i think she has been looking at me(no more than think). Yesterday, while there were lunch at school, i sat like 2 meters(sorry, i don't know how many feet that is ^_^ ) away from here, she was sitting with here left side towards me. She got up, turned towards me to walk around the table she sat on to sit on the other side. While she was walking that short distance, our eyes met and we looked at eachother for like 2-3 seconds. Thats when i realized i really liked this girl, because i got all warm inside and got a funny feeling.

Now, my problem is that i really want to be with her and get to know her, but that is kind of a problem, since no-one i really know, know her, except the little sister of a guy who is "kind" of my friend, but i don't really know her that well to talk to her about the girl i like. The only thing i've done to make "contact" is to send her a small poem on a chat/forum/meeting site(but she hasnt answered yet). But i really don't know if she knows that i'm the guy who sent the poem or if she really knows who i am at all. Now, i'm wondering if anyone have any idea what to do to aproach this situation, because i really like her, even if i don't know her.

Thanks for reading...

Blaze

Only-virgins · #2 (**permalink**) 08-04-05, 05:46 AM

I cant help you because when I liked a girl I did jack shit about it and now I am trying to figure out if I should do anything about it even 8 years later. I guess just do anything so you dont end up like me....dreaming of a person you barely know exists.

Kiechi · #3 (**permalink**) 08-04-05, 08:59 AM

"Learn from other peoples mistakes". Don't let your situation develop into same state as OV's. Talk to the girl. You'll just wonder "What if?" if you don't. If you happen to get rejected, then it's meant to be, at least then you know where you stand. Dont' spend the rest of your life waitin' for the right catch, you got to head out there to find it. Life's to short to be wondering what the outcome might be, go ahead and find out what the outcome is. It doesn't hurt to try.

"You gain wisdom from failure, not success"

If it doesn't work out at least you know your 1 step ahead in the wisdom game. Good luck with the situation, hope everything works out for you. I look forward to updates on the situation.

Chlorine · #4 (**permalink**) 08-04-05, 11:36 PM

Blaze----Since you don't have any friends in common, you'll just have to do it the hard way. Next time you see her at lunch, pluck up all your courage and plonk yourself down right next to her. Smile and start talking.

longtime · #5 (**permalink**) 08-04-05, 11:46 PM

Be brave. The next time you see her just go talk to her. Since you don't know her right now you really have nothing to lose

Stillinlove · #6 (**permalink**) 09-04-05, 01:03 AM

yah youll have to approach the situation head on, because dreaming of a person years later tears you up inside, and drives you to the edge of sanity (or beyond it =) ) Just go talk to her bro.

Only-virgins · #7 (**permalink**) 09-04-05, 01:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stillinlove

yah youll have to approach the situation head on, because dreaming of a person years later tears you up inside, and drives you to the edge of sanity (or beyond it =) ) Just go talk to her bro.

Yea, I'll vouch for that.

Chii 288 · #8 (**permalink**) 09-04-05, 04:22 PM

Blaze, I was in the same situation for over a year. Liked this boy at school and stuff but he didn't know me. I had no idea how to approach him. I was terribly shy and scared. Then, just a month ago I texted him thinking: Well, he won't bite me or whatsoever. He replied, we got to know each other, went out with each other but it obviously didn't work. He rejected me saying: "It was preety good but I wouldn't try it again". Right now I feel like the biggest idiot but surprisengly, I'm still alive and I can finally get over him. All I'm trying to tell you is: Go and get closer to that girl. You'll never know what might happen. If the things don't work, fine, you've tried, you'll survive. But it may mean also a beginning of a new relationship.
Anyway, good luck!

Blaze · #9 (**permalink**) 09-04-05, 08:18 PM

Tnx guys(and girl). I'll try to approach her and start talking. I guess i don't have anythink to lose. But i would prefer talking to her when she's alone... Hehe... But what exactly should i start talking about? I just don't know what to talk about.

Joe_Watson · #10 (**permalink**) 09-04-05, 08:59 PM

Quote:

But what exactly should i start talking about? I just don't know what to talk about.

Yeah, I'm in the same boat as you. After "how ya' doing?" conversation gets very difficult, simply because I don't know what to say next. I don't what to talk about or how to keep a conversation going. It's just hard for me because I don't have any good topics.

Chii 288 · #11 (**permalink**) 09-04-05, 09:21 PM

Yeah, it really is annoying. Especially if you're not a talkative person so just hope she talks all the time! lol, nah, try to tell her something interesting (or funny) and at the same time be natural. That way she'll defenitly remember you. Personally, I hate guys who act all bad and stuff so I'll say that you avoid this kind of behaviour!

Joe_Watson · #12 (**permalink**) 09-04-05, 10:33 PM

Quote:

Yeah, it really is annoying. Especially if you're not a talkative person so just hope she talks all the time! lol, nah, try to tell her something interesting (or funny) and at the same time be natural.

Well, most of the girls I know aren't very talkative, so unless I say something, they won't either. It seems like I need to be the one to start the conversation because most of the time they don't. If I knew how to start the convo and then knew what to say, I'd be all set. But I don't know anything interesting or funny to say, and I really usually don't talk that much to begin with. I just really need some help with this.

Joe_Watson · #13 (**permalink**) 10-04-05, 10:29 AM

Could someone please give us (Me and Blaze) some good conversation topics and such? Thanks.

bohemiandonut · #14 (**permalink**) 10-04-05, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe_Watson

Could someone please give us (Me and Blaze) some good conversation topics and such? Thanks.

There's no such thing as a conversation topic, at least not in this context.

You need to be able to make commentary on the situation you are sharing. And then, the conversation usually evolves. To fill awkward silence, say her name out loud, contemplatively. Girls like to hear their name. Well, at least I like to hear my name.

There's another pointer. Say what you would want to hear. Be egotistical. Assume that she is you, and you're just talking to yourself, about whatever. It helps.

Peace.

Joe_Watson · #15 (**permalink**) 10-04-05, 09:28 PM

Thanks. So I guess if I make comments about stuff, maybe that'll get her to talk back to me. Maybe some of what I say will interest her and she will start talking to me. But I'm not one to just start talking about what's going on. Instead, I usually just walk up to someone and try to start a convo, regardless of whether anything exciting is happening nearby. So I need to know what kinds of stuff I can just easily chat about.