How to ask a girl out right?

[Joe_Watson]

I think part of my problem when asking girls out is that I visibly appear very nervous and thus have a tendency to just freak girls out. I have a feeling this nervousness is coming off as being desperate, which is something I really don't want to convey. It just feels like I'm totally freaking them out when I ask them out. Even if I know them pretty well. How do I deal with this nervousness?

I usually ask them to a movie. I say hey and then start describing the movie a bit and end by asking if they'd like to go see it. Is there anything wrong with that approach? Or is it boring? By the way, I'm a freshman in high school, no drivers licence. Please help me improve my approach to this. If you require any additional information, just ask.

What's the right way to ask a girl out? It's just that I've tried a few times, have had no successes, and am looking to improve myself. Thanks for reading this. Also, if you have any other good ideas for first dates, please share them. It's just that a movie is the first thing that comes to mind.

[bohemiandonut]

The best way is to come to terms with your own self-esteem.

You'd be amazed how easy it is to talk to people (even girls) when you realize, you don't give a f*ck what they think.

I'll repost something good I saw recently:

"Instead of wondering whether she will like you, wonder if you will like her."

It's all about just changing your perspective.

Nothing she can do will actually affect you. You may feel burned, a little, but guess what? It will pass! Isn't that a relief? No feeling you could ever have could possibly last forever. It's easy to think that by changing the present you are setting the future. You are not. You're just changing the present. So have as much fun with it as you can, because one day, you won't be able to, you know?

Peace.

[Joe_Watson]

You're right, I guess it really is mostly about changing my perspective. Now that I think about it, I really should be more worried about me liking them than them liking me. Maybe if I didn't care about what people thought of me so much, I could approach this with a more laid-back attitude. Your post was very thought provoking and I definitely feel a bit wiser after reading it. Thanks Donut. If anyone else wants to contribute, feel free to chime in. Thanks in advance.

[King Zarathu]

You're right, I guess it really is mostly about changing my perspective. Now that I think about it, I really should be more worried about me liking them than them liking me. Maybe if I didn't care about what people thought of me so much, I could approach this with a more laid-back attitude. Your post was very thought provoking and I definitely feel a bit wiser after reading it. Thanks Donut. If anyone else wants to contribute, feel free to chime in. Thanks in advance.

Agreed.

Hey, Joe.. you've been here a while and so have I. Do you have AIM at all?

[bohemiandonut]

Ahahahaha! What on earth is that signature?!? Is that you?

Hahaha!

[OpticalIllusion]

The best way is to come to terms with your own self-esteem.

You'd be amazed how easy it is to talk to people (even girls) when you realize, you don't give a f*ck what they think.

I'll repost something good I saw recently:

"Instead of wondering whether she will like you, wonder if you will like her."

It's all about just changing your perspective.

Whoot!! I've been quoted. I feel so loved
But anways, it's just like he said. Once you don't give a f*ck, things will become easier. And not just with girls either. You'll probably gain a good number of close buddy's from this attitude too.

[Alicias]

confidence! Girls like that!

Just treat her like your friend when u come to her,
take it like knowing someone(guy) new...
dont think it as if ur meeting ur bride of the future....and u'll feel better

And dont pretend, be normal
and listen to her, read her responses
and give aproperiate responses
dont rush it like ur a straving dog digging its bones or having the anxity attack...
it really freaks girls out.....