what to do...? - Love Forum

CodeBoy · #1 (**permalink**) 30-05-05, 12:50 PM

hi, i'm 16 years old in high school. I've never had a girlfriend before and I'm kind of shy but I have several friends. So anyway, about a month ago I got a crush on this girl that I didn't know too well but I have 3 classes with her. I started just saying hi to her and initializing small conversations with her about things like school. I found out she is on the track & field team so I talked to her about that aswell. This was the first time I've really ever talked to a girl I liked so at first I was a bit nervous but I'm not as nervous around her now. She seems very nice and friendly to me but I don't think she knows how I feel about her. I want to tell her so bad but I wouldn't until we got to know each other better. Even then I probably wouldn't tell her, would just show her I like her and let her figure it out.

The problem is...about a week later I found out she's going out with another guy. This guy is probably the most popular guy I know. He's smart, outgoing, athletic...etc. I'm disappointed because I thought maybe I would work up the courage to ask her out. Now I feel like I will never have a chance of asking her out. Then even if I was to ask her out I don't think she would say yes if she can get a guy like that. It seems like getting a girl is a popularity contest or something.

anyways...summer is coming up. so I guess I won't see her or talk to her probably until next school year. I don't have her phone number or anything and i would feel too weird asking her for it. I not sure what to do. I still want to talk to her but maybe I should forget about her and move on.

mhussain · #2 (**permalink**) 30-05-05, 05:53 PM

dude ... unfortunately in high school it sometimes does become a popularity contest ...

if during the time when u were with her did u ever get the feeling that she liked u ?
and dude ... never say never ....

have patience(easier said than done) ..... and start working on/trying on how not to be that nervous ... i am sure u r a great guy .. so have confidence in urself ...

do what u think is right ....

and hope for the best but remember .. dont get urself hung u on one person ... there are many great girls out there who i am sure(and hope) appreciate character more than popularity

best of luck

Hussain

xplodinjohnno · #3 (**permalink**) 30-05-05, 07:20 PM

WOW there is a person from melb in here!!!

Anyways,
codeboy look on the bright side of things, work up the courage to ask for her phone number or something like that, I know its way easier said than done but trust me gurls these days like guys with courage. So go for it.....
Dont have shame on urself because there's another guy out there that are bigger, better and faster than you. Dont put ur self down, you are as good of a person as he is. (i hope that made sence) Since this is your first love, jus keep in mind that there are many more fish in the sea! (but some how i cant seem to find the right one) Good luck wif it

mhussain · #4 (**permalink**) 30-05-05, 08:20 PM

best of luck codeboy ...

and yes jhonno , i am from melbourne .... why?

Hussain

CodeBoy · #5 (**permalink**) 30-05-05, 09:27 PM

I'm not sure if she likes me or not. I haven't been around her long enough to know. I don't sit beside her in class so I usually only get to talk to her in the halls. I noticed she does use my real name now when she talks to me (she used to use my nickname from spanish class) if that counts for anything. Other than that It's hard to say.

Until I started talking to her I've been pretty much a quiet person, she might just be getting used to the idea that I'm not mute after all. It took quite a bit of confidence for me to talk to her and it was shot down when this other guy started going out with her but I haven't given up.

I think the main reason I'm nervous now about asking her for her number and things like that is because I'm afraid to let her know I like her, especially now that she's got a BF. I've never been in a situation anything like this before and I don't want to do something stupid I will regret later.

mhussain · #6 (**permalink**) 31-05-05, 10:52 AM

mate ... its good to hear that you are getting some confidence in your self ... remember it is not easy anyway liking someone and you like someone who is going out with someone else .... dont give up mate .... but be awake .. don let your affection for her cloud you eyes to reality ,.,..

start talking to her .. even if it has to be in front of her bf ... when u talk to her look at her straight into her eyes .... and when she answers you look straight at her into her eyes ..... bf's and gf's based on popularity contests dont last long

be honest ... to urself

best of luck

Hussain

CodeBoy · #7 (**permalink**) 06-06-05, 12:39 AM

i was just wondering....even if this girl does like me, will she show it? I mean she may not know for sure that I like her or maybe she knows and doesn't want to break up with her bf or doesn't feel the same way about me.

Sometimes when I see her I wait to see if she will talk to me but she usually doesn't. I get the feeling she isn't interested but maybe she is just waiting for me to make the move. I just don't feel right talking to her if she doesn't like me but I don't know.

mhussain · #8 (**permalink**) 06-06-05, 03:45 AM

whether she shows it or not ... is upto her and u cant decide her actions so stop aowwry ing about that and whether she decides to break up with her bf or not is again upto her ...

and if u get the feeling ... then follow that feeling ...

use the force codeboy

Hussain

cutiekitti16 · #9 (**permalink**) 06-06-05, 07:16 AM

you should ask her or one of her friends for her number...

Frasbee · #10 (**permalink**) 06-06-05, 09:38 AM

I feel for ya dude.

I feel for ya.

blauw · #11 (**permalink**) 06-06-05, 11:19 AM

Hi Codeboy,

If I were u , I would gather the courage to ask her phonenumber. Easier said then done... I agree.
But when U won't ... u'll regret it for quite some time ...

Just make a scenario in ur head about how & where u can ask for it.
U can also write a note saying what u feel ... hoping she will understand.
And if she doesn't, she ain't worth it man.

Let us know how it went

Greets

Tone · #12 (**permalink**) 06-06-05, 10:32 PM

Rejection is better than regret.

CodeBoy · #13 (**permalink**) 07-06-05, 04:11 AM

I guess that might be part of the reason I haven't done it, I'm afraid of rejection. I'd feel embarressed and pretty much everyone would find out about it. I know I care too much about what other people think but I can't help it.

Tone · #14 (**permalink**) 07-06-05, 04:15 AM

Wouldn't you rather know you tried though? Would you rather have people tease you for awhile about it on the outside or drive yourself crazy on the inside always wondering "What if... what if I asked her.. I wonder what she would say.. what if......" which could last for who knows how long.

What's the big deal, people are attracted to people, you should have nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed of, so just shrug it off when your friends tease you about it.

To me, being rejected, at least I know I tried and can move on and be done with it... to never try though, that is a regret I just don't want to have to live with.

But you're young and will have plenty of opportunities, but good luck!

mhussain · #15 (**permalink**) 07-06-05, 04:27 AM

CodeBoy ... u must know one thing ... rejection WILL hurt .... i hope that u dont get rejected but if u do it WILL hurt ...

but what good thing doesnt hurt .... and yes Tone is right , rejection is better that thinking that oh i wish i had asked her ....

best of luck mate ... and remember .. life teaches us lessons .. its upto us to learn them

Hussain