Long distance Relationship - my girl is in trouble and it's my fault... - Love Forum

FeelingSad · #1 (**permalink**) 24-08-03, 01:10 AM

Hello my name is Mike, I am 18 years old and I need some help. I met my girlfriend 2 months ago in ICQ and after 10 days of chating we where together. We never met in real life because she lives 600 miles away, just phoned and exchanged photos but that was enough to love her with all my heart and soul and after her laptop screwed up I phoned with her every day.
But now there is a big problem...
Last time I had contact with her was wednesday morning. She called me from a public phone at the place where she works and told me her father got the bill for the cell phone which was 600$ for hers.... He smashed her phone, called her names, she has to pay the bill on her own, and he wanted to call me because my number was all over the bill. I didn't had time to talk with her because I had an appointment at the Hospital and my father urged me to hang up...
She told me that her father had urged her to give him my home-number and he wanted to call me wednesday afternoon, but i got no call from him...
I got more worried and so I decided yesterday to log in into her yahoo account(she gave mer her mail passwords to check her mail after her laptop screwed up) to ask someone from her family for her home-number(she didn't wanted to give it to me because her father has the homephone all the time...)
I talked to her 16 year old aunt, but she didn't wanted to give me the number because I "already caused enough trouble and shouldn't make it worse then it is right now". She told me that the total bill was 1800$ and that her father will send my girl off to a girls camp(I don't know if this is serious, she is 18 and she is done with school..).
I just feel so goddamn guilty, sorry and I don't know how to contact her, I sent her a letter and I am still waiting for a life sign.
I know her home-phone number now but I don't know what to do...
This is all my fault and I feel like throwing up...
Her father is a real redneck asshole and I fear that he will send her away...
But what worries me most is that I don't know how she feels and what she thinks about me and this makes me sick, I can't stop thinking about her...
I really don't know what to do and I can't stop blaming myself...

Can someone please give me advice, because this is really killing me...

youri21 · #2 (**permalink**) 24-08-03, 06:23 AM

what were you thinking about calling up her cell phone? that it was free or something?
anyway, quit it and start over with a new "close" distance relationship!

IceQueen · #3 (**permalink**) 25-08-03, 03:54 AM

Quote:

Her father is a real redneck asshole

Love your nerve! The guy got stuck with a $1800 bill because of YOU, and when he was unhappy about it, you're calling him a "redneck asshole"?

Quote:

Can someone please give me advice, because this is really killing me...

Take responsibility for your actions, ask her father his home address, and SEND HIM THE CHECK.

Belmina · #4 (**permalink**) 26-08-03, 08:14 AM

Hi Mike! I had the same problem. I called my boyfriend many times and i got the bill 1000 $. Sorry,I'm not American and my grammar is not perfect but I am trying to help you. I have also a long distance relationship. My boyfriend lives in another county 4000 km far from me. We are togther one year an one week

I really think this kind of relationship can work out. Please now help ypur girlfriend. If you care for her dont find a new girl. Now I'm spendin my summer with my boyfriend. He finish the college and he spend the summer in my house with him. I'm watching him sleep and I know all I fdid and all my souffering had reasons. Try to do the same. The hard moments will pass. The father one day will stop to be angry.And you contact her as you can. Me and my boy chat eceryday(when he is far) by msn messenger.Try to do the same.
Hope I help you
Also if I dont know good english
bye

Calgacus · #5 (**permalink**) 26-08-03, 08:29 AM

This perplexes me. How can you fall for someone you've never met

Don't take guilt for the bill too seriously though. That was her fault - not yours (You weren't calling collect, were you?

) The person who suggested sending this unfortunate guy the check was correct - it would solve the problem - but I know it's probably not a possibility.

In future, you should consider falling for one of those voice recordings on a freephone number - that will save you money, and she won't have a known father to worry about either

leight69 · #6 (**permalink**) 26-08-03, 08:29 AM

Quote:

We never met in real life because she lives 600 miles away, just phoned and exchanged photos but that was enough to love her with all my heart and soul

What?!?! How on Earth does that work?!?! Where do relationships like this lead?!?!

IceQueen · #7 (**permalink**) 27-08-03, 12:53 AM

[off-topic]

Quote:

What?!?! How on Earth does that work?!?! Where do relationships like this lead?!?!

In my own, personal case -- to a lifetime of happiness.

[/off-topic]

leight69 · #8 (**permalink**) 27-08-03, 01:09 AM

Touché IceQueen.

To each his or her own I suppose.

Illusional · #9 (**permalink**) 27-08-03, 06:35 PM

hahah with all these replyes..i have to read this post... hold up

well for one thing, your relationship is over. i think that if you really feel bad about all this bullshit you should offer to help her pay for her bill because you did get her into this mess...and being that you are her online bf, you should take responsibility.

hahaha and about this father..wait till you have kids..espeically a girl and she's a rebel. lol. raverboy

MichaelBlue · #10 (**permalink**) 28-08-03, 10:12 AM

I'd call and ask for her dad.
Don't tell him right off the bat who you are, the first thing out of your mouth should be "I want to help pay the phone bill I helped create, how would (insert $ amount here) be for a start, and where do I send the money order?

If he still hangs up, I'd try again in 2 weeks...then maybe once more, but if none of that works...it's over. If you know her name, she'll be 18 in a couple years and you can find eachother again then.

Best of luck!

Hoss · #11 (**permalink**) 31-08-03, 01:53 PM

I like what Mike blue above me here put. I know probably everyone on this forums gonna rip me a new asshole for this one but the way I met my current g/f was threw a friend, and then online. turns out we live in neighboring towns so that was kinda easy for us, but we met basically the same way u did, talked for 11 days then became a couple just by personality and old pictures. Anyway her father's probably on the verge of using a shotgun or something o yea offer to help pay for the bill, and if your not too low on money possibly send a gift to the family if u know where she lives. He'll probably not like it but its a start. Wow 600 miles away, man thats love for you.

des21 · #12 (**permalink**) 01-09-03, 03:59 AM

I agree with the people who have suggested pitching in on the bill. If you really care for her you have to support her and help her deal with her problems, including the phone bill. Even if you have send a little bit every month. Keep records of it (in case there are any legal issues here-don't know) and try seeing if you contact her again to see how she feels about the situation.