Whats up with this girl - Love Forum

Goo10Tag · #1 (**permalink**) 16-07-05, 03:33 AM

ey, I'm new to the forum and figured I would ask you all a question.

I've lived next to a friend of mine for around 16 years or so. She is 18 and I am 20. We had something going at one point but she never really was my type, I just found another girl and moved on. But we still talk to eachother about what's going on. Anyways her behavior is starting to make me wonder. The last year or so it seems like she has been going through guys like socks. She uses the internet match/rating sites to meet these people. I keep telling her she's going to find some nutcase on there some day.

The first guy she met turned out to be a tad crazy. They dated for a year and then it fell apart. Now fast forward a year and 15 guys later. She found one guy that seems like a descent person. He holds down a steady job, has his crap in order. Everything seems good except for one thing...he doesn't want to have sex with her just yet. He has trust issues because of his last girlfriend. Can't blame 'em i've been through that crap before w/ girls. Both of them have been talking to me about it. Anyways, they've only known eachother about a month or so. Now she is thinking about breaking it off over the fact he wants to hold off on the sex.

Now about a week ago the creepy first guy showed up at my house out of the blue. We've not seen him for a year or so. The only reason he came out was to ask about her...kind of on the verge of stalking I think. The girl kept talking how much she hated the first kid and acted creeped out by him. He got a lot worse since we've last seen him, he dropped out of school, started smoking, stopped medications for his problems, gained weight etc (this is one messed up son of a gun). Anyways I saw his car at her house yesterday...she walked out with him and left. My point is.....is she just crazy or what? Dropping the good guy for this nutjob. She may have a sexual addiction, or some type of deal where she needs constant attention. Those of you who took the time to read it..what do you think is going on in her head.

Stillinlove · #2 (**permalink**) 16-07-05, 04:04 AM

wow this is a pretty messed up situation dude. Sex is a really important thing in peoples lives i guess. and alot of people just hook up with eachother to do it <_<. I mean, i dunno, lol. Talk to her man, dont let her get in any trouble. 15 guys o_O. Even i woulda stepped in and said something.

TAVS · #3 (**permalink**) 16-07-05, 04:11 AM

Yea, Crazy. Definately crazy

Goo10Tag · #4 (**permalink**) 16-07-05, 04:20 AM

Well she met around 15 guys on that site...she had a serious relationship with 7 or 8 of them. I think she just craves attention. The new guy was telling me he parted with $50 everytime they hung out. She's something else.

TenorTwo · #5 (**permalink**) 16-07-05, 10:01 PM

Yeah... crazy.

Any girl that throws away a good guy is just plain psychotic and needs the attention. It's disgusting! I got hit with that crap! Fell for a girl like that, and I was the coolest thing for the two weeks she dated me, and suddenly, I was "too much of a gentleman."

Your girl has an issue with attention, or maybe commitment. Best course of action would be to talk to her about it, if at all possible.

whaywardj · #6 (**permalink**) 16-07-05, 10:09 PM

Sounds like she's hurting over something very much. Or is very angry about something. They're, pretty much, the same thing. Does she know her behavior appears self-destructive?

Goo10Tag · #7 (**permalink**) 18-07-05, 12:57 AM

I think a lot of it has to do with immaturity. She doesn't see that if she waits in the long run she ends up with an okay person. But she throws it all away for a few moments of fun. You see a lot of other girls like that? Sounds like more guys that girls.

whaywardj · #8 (**permalink**) 18-07-05, 01:51 AM

Yep. And, like I said, most of them I encountered were hurt or pissed-off about something and lashing out at other people as if they were just consumable items. It can be an expression of immaturity, I suppose. That's why I asked, does she know how her behavior appears?

Goo10Tag · #9 (**permalink**) 19-07-05, 10:19 AM

She's completely oblivious about her behavior...I've confronted her about it many occasions but it's like pouring gasoline on a fire. I'm not sure what it'll take for her to change. Her mom had brian surgery years back...so she couldn't be there discipline-wise...I think that is the root of her behavior problem. This girl is not a monster though...she just doesn't know how to treat people...just ignorant to other's feelings.

It took an intersting turn when her boyfriend went online on another screen name he had made up. He asked her (acting as another guy) if she was single and she said "no ..but i wish i was." She said she was "just kidding" (now remember we assume she was thinking that she spoke to a complete stranger at first). They're still trying to fix the relationship though. :/

Lonesomepoet76 · #10 (**permalink**) 19-07-05, 08:08 PM

Sounds similar to my last gf. Id keep my distance.

whaywardj · #11 (**permalink**) 21-07-05, 07:42 AM

Goo10tag -- I don't remember if was here or on another forum where a husband made arrangements to meet with a "screen name" who turned out to be his wife. Sounds like the stuff of movies, but the poster swore it happened. Last heard, they're still trying to unsort THAT one. Makes me happy to be single.

Goo10Tag · #12 (**permalink**) 22-07-05, 04:20 AM

Yea...I think the internet has opened a new door for couples who cheat on eachother. It makes it a lot easier to meet people...you don't have to risk meeting them in person to gauge their personality and so on. Seems like as soon as she has problems she starts looking for a new one online....in real life i doubt she would find many..she's quiet.