How much should I take? - Love Forum

belowthebelt · #1 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 07:10 AM

I have been in a relationship now for just over 2 years, we are about 3 hours drive apart. My g/f is now in her final year of college, and has told me that she wants to "live it up" in her last year. I found out today that a guy came over to her room today, and they cuddled. Nothing more. She believes that going out and making out with a guy is not cheating, and cuddling is ok as well. She says I shouldn't be worried cause she'll always come home to me in the end. I haven't been i many relationships, and was wondering what everyone has to say about my situation. I'm afraid that she's going to get drunk one night, a guy will go back to her room, they'll "cuddle", then when he wants to go further(cause we all know that that's what the guy is doing there in the first place, to get it on, not to cuddle) she's going to put on the brakes and say, "I have a b/f so nothing below the waist!". What's he going to do? Stop? I don't want her or me to get hurt. I love this girl so much, but her response to me being jealous is, go ahead and be jealous, cause it's not going to stop me. How to I talk to her about this situation? I don't want to just say, don't do it or I'll leave, cause there has to be a way to make her understand how I feel about it all.
HELP ME!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!

lilwing89 · #2 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 07:22 AM

haha id be soooooo pissed if i was you..

have a party(and only invite girls) and invite her and make out iwth a bunch of girls and cuddle with everyone at the party except her(be the *****)

then at the end, ask her if she had fun...(she should change her mind about the whole thing after this)

if you dont wanna do that here's plan b

PLAN B
drive her crazy, **** her for the last time then when you get done...bout an hour later(or the day after when you get up if you spend the night) put on a dramatic scene get a few tears
then tell her "there is something that ive been keeping from you for the past 2 years" then after her reaction go "i have AIDS!" then tell her you dont think its right for the 2 of you to go out and break up with her!
then like the day before she goes and gets checked for aids, tell her you thought you would get a good hardy laugh from her before you broke up with the *****...tlel her she is a skanky ho...and no guys are gonna wanna go out with her if she is like that.

i hate stupid ****in skanky ho's like that!!!!

lilwing89 · #3 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 07:25 AM

wait a second...didnt you tell her that you dont like the idea of her doing stuff with another guy??

cheazypeaz · #4 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 07:41 AM

shut up you silly kid.. please.

if i was in this guys position, i would talk to her, explain EXACTLY how you feel. saying how you think its not reasonable for her to do that in a relationship.

she dosent sound like she is a cheater because she wouldnt tell you anything if she was, so dont worry about that. alcahol causes problems. i always forget about stuff alcahol instigated. like if someone gets drunk and kisses someone.. been there done that.

spike

Late_vamp · #5 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 07:56 AM

man , get a grip on your girl . whats that about cuddeling , do the same (cuddle with some girl ) and tell her about it after youv done it , then see the reaction she has . if she doesnt mind i say she will most probably screw when someone else when shes drunk , if she does get bothered , then tell her to stop doing it , because it bothers you alot .

NeoSeminole · #6 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 08:25 AM

Your gf is being immature. Don't play her silly games by going out and doing the same thing. Be a man. You should tell your gf that what she is doing is wrong. No straight (I had to add that in there) guy in their right mind wants to cuddle with a girl unless he's getting something out of it. Your gf's intentions might be sincere, but his sure aren't. Explain to her that she is putting herself in a very dangerous situation. All it takes is for one "heat of the moment" to ruin everything between you two. Welcome to the wonderful world of girls.

Lloyd95 · #7 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheazypeaz

shut up you silly kid.. please.

spike

Dude "Spike" (is that your real name? The one your momma gave you?), I hope that wasn't directed at my boy LilWang.

Lighten up, punk.

gHEXjt · #8 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 10:51 AM

Two words came to my mind after reading your post. DUMP HER. My god. Not only would I be really pissed at her, but I would drive the 3 hours to her school first, with a baseball bat as my passenger, beat the shit out of the guy screwing around with my girl, and then dump her.

Bottom line is, do exactly what you said you didn't want to do. Her living it up for senior year shouldn't consist of her screwing around with other guys. That's perhaps the dumbest thing I've ever heard. You should tell her that her behavior is unacceptable, and if she wants to be in a relationship with you, to end that bullshit. If she doesn't, tell her your done. But like I said, had shit like that happened to me already, I would've dumped her right away. You gotta hold on to your dignity man. And if you let her pull that shit on you, not only will you be her *****, but you will have no dignity. Good Luck

lilwing89 · #9 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 10:52 AM

cheazypeaz, if you think im gonna shut up just because you said so...your out of your damn mind! what the **** is your problem?? lighten the **** up and laugh at a joke every once and a while

Quote:

Originally Posted by NeoSeminole

Your gf is being immature. Don't play her silly games by going out and doing the same thing. Be a man. You should tell your gf that what she is doing is wrong. No straight (I had to add that in there) guy in their right mind wants to cuddle with a girl unless he's getting something out of it. Your gf's intentions might be sincere, but his sure aren't. Explain to her that she is putting herself in a very dangerous situation. All it takes is for one "heat of the moment" to ruin everything between you two. Welcome to the wonderful world of girls.

ma'boy neoseminole said it all for me..this is exactly what i would do but might i add...i love cuddling with girls!!

i love how sexy they are yum yum...i wanna cuddle with my gf right now!! its not like i have to find a needle out of a haystack or something...and in the longrun i do get a hell a lot out of it..lil wang always gets a lil somethin hehe

Frasbee · #10 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 11:33 AM

Don't worry Wing.

I got yo' back.

IDon'tGetBoys · #11 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 12:17 PM

this chick is crazy and you are crazy for putting up with the crap. Tell her how you feel and if she blows it off, you know its time to move on

Mishanya · #12 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 02:46 PM

I know exactly how you feel belowthebelt.

My ex tried to pull the same on me (Only it didnt go to the level of her actually cuddling with some one else). She pretty much said that its okay for her to flirt with other guy, make herself seem available and lead them on because at the end of the day she will come back to me and i should "TRUST" her (The most rediculus thing i've ever heard because she would totaly flip if i did the same to her). I came down hard on her becuase i dont think this kind of behaviour should be tolerated in the relationship. So she decided to let me go and actually i felt happy about it. Because if your significant other behaves so disrespectfully and so shamelessly towards you then you definatelly deserve to be with someone else.

As a first step you SHOULD let your feeling be known and you SHOULD let her know that you are after a monogomous relationship and will not stand for anything that falls short of that. If she is unhappy about that then be prepared to move because this relationship will only end in tears. If she understands you and promises to change then proceed ahead with extreme caution.

How old are you guys? If she hasn't had a lot of experience in the relationships in the past then she might not be ready for the same level of commitment as you require and once again you are better off looking for someone else. Someone else is not that hard to find by the way (The hard part is letting go)

Hope above helps, good luck!!!

cheazypeaz · #13 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 05:53 PM

sorry but your crazy, and yes, spike is my middle name, thanks.

calmsavagebeast · #14 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 06:39 PM

what is with the "i want to live it up" bullshyt? Tell her she should have lived it up in High School, or do what lilwing said and nail her one last time, then tell her you have AIDS, but wait till she flips out, then tell her you were just messin, it would be hilarious.

Airborne · #15 (**permalink**) 31-08-05, 06:51 PM

I would have a chat with her if I was you, a cuddle can lead to a slippery slope, and it would be mental torture for you to be constantly wondering what it is she is up to.

It may wlel be that she is scared of commitment, 2 years is a long time, and she may well feel like a change and this is her way of indicating it. Alternately she may just be very liberal and flirtatious when it comes to being with the guys at her college, and enjoy teasing them.

Saying she will come back to you is very little comfort for you, so I think the best way is to tell her how you feel about it. She would be stupid to jeopardise a 2 year relationship for a kiss and a cuddle.