No signs of affection - Love Forum

Imcrazy · #1 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 04:33 AM

ok me an my girlfriend have been goin out for 4 months now an she has told that sometimes i dont show her much affection which was true but sorted now i kiss her an hold her in public an all that kinda stuff well .........
She doesnt give me any afffection if we talkin in a food palce or standin round with friends talkin or whatever she will never put her arm round me or reach to hold my hand she never kisses me i always have to make the first move an it really gettin to me ............. i want to tell her that but i dont the last thing i ever want to do is hurt her please someone give me some help.

cheazypeaz · #2 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 05:16 AM

wouldn't worry about it.

just make the first move, who cares?

shh! · #3 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 05:20 AM

Maybe she is private by nature. Public displays of affection make me a little uncomfortable, too. There is a time and a place, you know. Besides, I always felt like property when guys have done that to me, kind of like they are marking their territory.

clynn · #4 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 05:27 AM

I think it is interesting that she said that you never showed her affection, and now that you are....that she isn't responding. Hmmm...? Interesting.

True, though, some people are uncomfortable with public displays of affection. Maybe she doesn't feel secure enough? i don't know...

Imcrazy · #5 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 05:59 AM

clynn i see ya point about it being dodgy but i know she loves me she tells me an people have said she does

an it aint just in public in private aswell we was watchin a film an we was lieinon my sofa together with my arm round her but she never kissed me once an i was sort of bugged by it the only thing she really did was when i was lieing on ma bed watchin somat she came over an lay beside me an curled her body round me which felt really nice as she never odne it before ..... maybe im just bein stupid

carpflounder · #6 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 06:53 AM

Follow your instincts. I dated a girl for 6 months who had the same symptoms. She would NEVER reach out to me. Not to hold my hand, not to hug me....NOTHING. Sometimes she would just shake me off if I tried to hug her. The only time she showed me the affection I wanted was when we were having sex. I could just tell that something was wrong.

It took me a while but eventually I found out that she had been molested by her grandfather. She never got help....so she doesn't relate in a healthy way to men. In fact, she often talked about her schemes of how she used guys.

What you have said about that girl IS NOT NORMAL. You deserve better. Dont waste your time trying to help her, or turn her into the sweet girl that you want to be.

Tone · #7 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 07:40 AM

You're 15 right? The 15 year old who posted his pic and pleaded for people to tell him he's attractive?

Understand that at your age, what other people think about your g/f is more important than a catastrophic asteroid on a collision course for the earth. You're young, you'll learn.

shh! · #8 (**permalink**) 13-09-05, 07:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Imcrazy

we was watchin a film an we was lieinon my sofa together with my arm round her but she never kissed me once an i was sort of bugged by it

Umm... I don't know. Maybe she just wanted to watch the movie. That is hardly a sign of abnormality.

If there are no other issues, I'd just say she is not into PDAs, and not try to over-analyze this.