you'll just have to be there to listen and be a friend. you don't have to "do" anything i'm sure. she'll tell you.

they're burying my guy today. i'm feeling better about it now. it happened very quickly, friday morning he was walking around doing fine, then monday night he was in terrible condition. but his parents had always wanted him to die before them. his mom passed away several years ago and his dad's health is in the decline. also, he didn't suffer and he went peacefully, which is all we can really ask from death.

the hardest part was calling my staff and being in touch with them and being "strong" for them. it still really hasn't hit me because there has been so much going on, i haven't had a moment to stop and really wrap my mind around it. but after today maybe i will.

he was 57 and he had downs syndrome, he lived much longer than anyone thought he would.

anyway, that's it for now...

Just a reminder that tomorrow's not promised to any of us.

after a great pain, a formal feeling comes
the nerves sit ceremonious, like tombs
the stiff heart questions was it he, that bore,
and yesterday, or centuries before?

the feet, mechanical, go round
of ground, or air, or ought-
a wooden way
regardless grown,
a quartz contentment, like a stone

this is the hour of lead-
remembered, if outlived,
as freezing persons, recollect the snow-
first - chill - then stupor - then the letting go -

-one of my very favorite poems written by emily dickinson.

Chin up hun. His time is passed and you have others who still need you. Focus on the good.

And having in thy life-depth thrown
Being and suffering (which are one),
As a child drops his pebble small
Down some deep well, and hears it fall
Smiling—so I. Thy days go on.

De Profundis

Sorry to hear about that.... Kidney failure is a scary thing.... especially when its sudden and there is no warning....

I get upset when a patient of mine dies after taking care of them a few weeks.. I can only imagine how you feel... it was like part of the family....

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Appreciate the good times and learn from the bad times....

Misombra, you are in a difficult career, and Im sorry for your loss. I also give you a ton of credit for the job you have. My brother was a social worker, and initially started off in the homes for the severe. I ALMOST took a position as a TA, but when I saw what was really happening I turned it down.

People with challenges are so lovable. I run a dentists office and we work with people who are challenged, and omg I just love them!

Take care sweetie, I know its hard not to get attached I dont think you cant. So Im thinking about you and your staff, my prayers are with you

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everything happens for a reason...