Okay - Here it is.

I honestly consider myself a NICE GUY.

I would never take advantage of ANY girl. I would NEVER talk to any girl in a bad tone. I would never be an ass toward any woman. In real life - I'm a shy, quiet guy. If you met me in real life - you wouldn't believe that I'm RSK! I've always been this way. Since I was a kid - I've always been respectfull toward others. I'm very well behaved - I never get into trouble. I never get into fights.

Having said what I have, I must also add: That I've never been laid. Never been kissed (go ahead - laugh). Never have done ANYTHING with a girl.

Yeah, it is quite pathetic, considering I'm 22. Just to add, I really am not a bad looking guy. I actually notice plenty of women checking me out at the mall - it's quite embarrasing really!

HERE IS MY FIRST QUESTION: WHY?

I have a friend, who is a complete ass toward girls. Yet, he's had many one night stands. This guy likes to stand out and impress others, and put down his own friends (I think people like this are asswipes). This guy likes to brag about this woman and that woman.

----------------------------------

If I were to change - then I wouldn't be acting like myself. But sometimes I feel like I should be like him - even though it doesn't feel natural. It's not that I want to get laid very badly, but I do at least want to experience something! At the same time, I don't want to act like an asswipe.

My problem is, that even though I am a 'nice guy' - my entire life I feel I've been surrounded by 'asswipes'. Once in a while, I'll meet a genuine and nice person, but then either I somehow **** it up, or my 'friend' takes over the show, and the chance to meet someone new is lost.

To clarify - I've known this friend for quite some time - so it's not like I could say bye to him, and call it that - I wouldn't want to anyway. But this friend is quite pushy, he tells me to take more risks all the time.

I'm not sure what I should do. I feel lost halfway somewhere.

SECOND QUESTION: WHAT SHOULD I DO?

listen to him, ask him his technique.. being shyboy wont get you anywhere, seriously.

thanks cheazypeaz

your quite right - my friend does know how to talk to the ladies - he's quite smooth

maybe i think i'm going to make a good effort to get out of my shell

for those of you who don't consider yourself shy, how do you be that way? do you EVER get nervous? I'm just too frickin shy! I wonder if I'm the only person with this kind of behavior!

If you don't mind me asking, what are some things i could do to exercise my 'unshyness'?

for somereason, i NEVER know what to say in a conversation. when my friend introduces me to someone - i feel okay when he is around (kind of like my buffer) - but when he leaves, i then FREEZE up and i don't really know what to do/say to strangers i've just met

people have told me to get interested in something, find a hobby, read the news, so that i can find something interesting to talk about - but i'm not a 35 year old - i'm a 22 year old, people my age talk more than how the weather was last week, and the chances of rainfall...blah...blah...blah,

as a college returnee, how do i acheive that extra 'shine', that extra 'glow' if you will.

I REALLY want to make a difference this time around - I hope someone knows where I am coming from, and can provide some advice on how to achieve what i want.

Thanks for your time...........

well, talking to girls isn't hard, youv'e just got to see it as 'ive got nothing to loose' which is true. this is because if you dont try you arent getting anywhere.

to talk to girls you dont have to be a bad person as such, just learn to talk to women, i find it hard with a new girlfriend, but its just something you have to do..

last time i did it, i lost my virginity, and if i had not of talked i wouldnt of been close. think about it... and sure, the sex is worth it .. lol.

lol, thank buddy! I appreciate your time, this year, I'm gonna see it as I've got nothing to loose:

except my dignity, my embarrasment, my rejection, my dorkiness exposed....etc......

...........lol - I'm just kidding......

......but i'm gonna give it a shot

Thanks again!

no you dont have any of those to loose.

embarassment? if you make a cockup, and she thinks it funny to embarras you about it then she is harsh, and you just dont have to talk to her or meet her.

being rejected? thats how it goes pal, but even if it happens, who cares, there are billions of women out there.

give it a go, tell us how you enjoyed it haha

You know. I am just like you...accept for one thing...I just don't care.

Here is what you do. Throw yourself into books. Study hard. Buy a ferrari and say " **** chicks..who needs them anyways?". I want to do that ...to bad i am lazy also though

well, for what its worth..if it makes you feel better then look at this way... I am 22, I am an ass, and I have never been laid..lol.

__________________
Dating is like a box of Chocolates, all the flavors suck and when you finally find the right filling it was already smashed by someone else's finger.

You need to take more risks. What your friend said ....was very true. If you don't then you will always wonder and be the one sitting back watching as other people have a life.

Girls can be just as shy and insecure. We fear rejection just as much...... ALot of girls also have that old fashioned thinking......like...."the guy should ask me first". Now I dont agree with it 100% but I know alot of girls who do.

So next time you see a girl checking you out and you think she looks good.....smile at her. Go along with it...... I mean don't feel all embarassed. You should be happy shes checking you out.... A smile can give a girl alot of courage....to approach you. I mean wouldn't u feel more confident if a girl smiled at you?

You don't have to lose the nice guy image completely. I mean you are 22....so the bad boy/high school thing is over with.... Alot of good women are looking for a nice guy......but also a guy who can be spontaneous....fun....crazy at times....etc. Doesn't mean you have to be a player. Players get old real fast. But sometimes women like it when a man takes control.... Now don't think you have to go and change yourself completely.....you should really just be yourself... Cuz eventually they are gonna find out how you are anyways.... Just go with the flow..... Stop thinking about the big picture and just have fun with it. One of these times your bound to have luck.....

lol.


________________

__________________
Dating is like a box of Chocolates, all the flavors suck and when you finally find the right filling it was already smashed by someone else's finger.

honestly guys, you got some catching up to do..

I know of a short pier you could walk off.

lol TAVS

thanks everyone for you advice, i'm gonna put it into action, and report back!

thanks only-virgins and ellynn

Sit down next to a girl before class starts and mention something about the professor/upcoming test/subject, etc. Introduce yourself.

If your campus has a shuttle system, say hi to a girl on the bus, ask if she's from the same state, her major, etc.

Pick out the cute/smart girl in your class or discussion section. Ask her a question about the subject, even if you already understand most of it. If you're really brave-get her number and ask if you can study with her sometime with a group of others. WARNING! This can be risky, as some girls just see it as a straightforward request for sex. Make sure she's acting friendly enough and seems open to talking/answering questions. Side note-a guy once asked me if he could get my number to help him learn chemistry stuff. I gave him my number and he never called me.

Just a few suggestions. I'm sure I'll think of more as the night progresses.

__________________
From one who knows everything about nothing plus much much more!

haha, i remember a girl actually giving me her number once - she wanted to share my text book, her friends took hers!

i never did call - i'm such an idiot - but thanks aloha!

I think if you take a shuttle system..you might as well forget getting laid ..lol..

__________________
Dating is like a box of Chocolates, all the flavors suck and when you finally find the right filling it was already smashed by someone else's finger.