Lacking confidence

[allflowerz]

I feel you, just dont think about it

[zro]

as others have mentioned confidence comes from practice, you might want to take up boxing, beating someone who weighs 20-40 kilos more than you is a definite confidence booster, also you can try a "**** the world" attitude, i have always had that mindsight and people always think i am confident... i am not really i just speak my mind anytime i want

[Tired]

i think ultimately....a toastmasters or a public speaking type class would really help, its just having the balls to go through with that. Presentations in class for example are awkward, you probably hate them, i personally get all sweaty and nervous and can barely breath, but then u do it and you think that wasn't THAT bad.

I give this advice but i haven't followed through on it, I just don't want to put myself in that situation even if it will probably better me in the long run. It just takes too much out of me and i don't wanna put myself in there.

I fear public speaking more then bungee jumping or spiders or whatever is feared by most. My body just completely goes berzerk in the even of presentations.

[Ath]

Public Speaking is the #1 Fear in America... Don't quote me on that though.

[vashti]

I've heard death is the number one fear, followed by public speaking.

[Tired]

Quote:

Originally Posted by vashti

I've heard death is the number one fear, followed by public speaking.

i'd much rather die then have to do a public speaking class!

[vashti]

Maybe you will die while giving a public speech...







j/k - public speaking is an acquired skill. Just practice *out loud* 10-15 times before actually "performing" and you'll be fine. Oh, and make sure you know what you are talking about. No one wants to listen to an idiot.

[DoesntMatter]

Try social lube (AKA alcohol). I believe it has a useful purpose (that is, killing shyness). Unfortunately, many people in the medical profession would probably not agree.

[Gigabitch]

Quote:

Originally Posted by DoesntMatter

Try social lube (AKA alcohol). I believe it has a useful purpose (that is, killing shyness). Unfortunately, many people in the medical profession would probably not agree.

I've made many speeches in public while using social lube. I don't remember how they were received, though.....

[Ath]

"Social lube" - Thanks! In all my years, that's a new one for me.. lol

[chargeup]

Quote:

Originally Posted by adam_clio

Hi,

i just feel as though everyone is just looking at me(very self conscious i think??) and i just cant relax or talk to people.


Thanks
Adam

Hi Adam,

Yes, too self consciousness makes you think that other people is always looking at you, which make you uneasy.

One way to counter that is NOT to focus your attention on yourself.

Try This: When you are going to talk to a stranger, picture in your mind that he/she is friendly and responding well to your conversation. Picture also that he/she is as nervous as you do and you are there to make him/her feel better. This will boost your self confidence.

[Ath]

And as far as everyday people go.. small talk is king.

[Ciprian]

I was listening to one of those dating cd's and David D had made a good suggestion. If you really want it, then you will need practice by being a more social person. Easy said then done? Not really. Everyday, try to say something to someone. Heres a suggestion, when paying for your groceries, ask how the clerks day is going, when buying coffee, do the same. If you see someone you would want to meet, notice something about them, there energy, style, books they are reading, or something along those lines. Eventually you will have an easier time talking to people, at random. You will not have to fake it, it will come naturally, because you will start enjoying meeting new people. Believe or not, there are alot of friendly people out there, and you might meet the one that befriends you.