My Dad was PISSED This Morning...

[Frasbee]

At 6:30, my alarm went off. I went to bed at about 11:30, so I got about 6 or so hours of sleep. Figured I'd sleep to about 7 or 7:15. Turns out I overslept a bit, and while I knew that if I jumped out of bed and into my car I would've made it to class, I was still feeling deadbeat tired, so I figured "I'll just go in late today."

At around 7:50 my dad is knocking at my door, stopping by on his way to his Fed Ex route. He asks me if I have school today, so I say "yes" and I tell him "not to worry about it".

He comes back 30 seconds later demanding I open the door, then starts ranting and raving how he's going to kick me out, and that he doesn't want to support a bum and that he has to pay (part) of my student loan and goes on and on and on. Quite the rude awakening. I tell him it's not a big deal, because quite frankly it isn't, but in his mind, I'm not taking school seriously enough. The only time he pays mind to my status in anything is when it seems to him that I'm lacking.

This guy never went to school, and he sure as hell ain't one to talk either cause he's always talkin' about the "shortcuts" and things he does at work to get more pay out of doing less work. Anybody here who is/was a student knows what they can get away with in terms of takin' off a day of school with whatever teacher without taking a hit on their grades.

But once again, like I said, he only pays me any mind when he thinks somethin' is off.

His work has been givin' him shit about some of the questionable things he does, and because he's older (not as strong or quick as the young guys), he's worried about them letting him go. So I think he's projecting those worries on to me, getting paranoid about my progress at school.

I talked to my teacher today about this, and she told me she'd talk to him if it made him feel better. Considering I have no intention of quitting, and I just got a 94 on my last test, these are all the things my dad doesn't see.

I can't stand him sometimes because he lectures like there's no tomorrow, about how experienced he is, and how naive and immature I am. Yet this is only because he only points out my faults, and none of my strengths or accomplishments. It's ****ing annoying.

No, I shouldn't have slept in, but I did, because I knew I could get away with it and because I've been working 6-7 days a week averaging 12-15 hour days. It's not like I sit at home all day after school and play videogames. In fact I have to leave right now because I have work. If working 14 hour days between school and work is lazy, then I don't even wanna know what bein' productive is.

[Gribble]

I used to get a lot of the same crap from my dad. I could never be proud of anything. If I worked hard and accomplished something with my own two hands he'd have to remind me that he works hard every day and how when he was my age he was living out of a car, working three jobs, and had only three hours to sleep a night. Blah blah blah. Not my fault he was an idiot and didn't stay in school.

Just keep doing what you're doing and don't let him get to you. Grit your teeth and get your schooling over with, then you can move out and start living. Your relationship with your dad will take a 180 when you get out from under his roof. At least that's how it worked for me.

[anachronistic]

I know he doesn't see everything that you're doing that's good, but he's only looking out for your best interest. He is probably worried about you, as well as the young'ns

Did you try to tell him you got a 94 on the last test?

[vashti]

The purpose of all this tension is mother nature's way of providing motivation for you to strike out on your own while ensuring your parent(s) are ready to see you go. I think Gribble is right in thinking things will improve when you are out on your own.

[Frasbee]

I just got to sit down and talk to him about it.

I told him I was taken back by his reaction this morning, because my intentions are just the very opposite of what he's fearful of. I explained to him I'm working and going to school, pretty much full time.

One of the first things he said was "look, we don't talk..."

That's just the point, we don't talk.

For the most part I don't mind, because he lets me do my thing, but at the same time, neither of us are informed on what the other is up to. So I gave him an update. Told him things are going well, and that I am enjoying school. We just started on wiring a house.

Anyway, he reassured me that if I have to cut back on work, but still need money, he'll spot me.

That's the support I need to hear.

Regardless, I intend on bitin' the bullet, continuing work and school just as I am. He's already supportin' me in other ways, I'm not gonna start askin' for cash. Plus, I gotta pay part of that loan too.

[vashti]

I'm sure he was happy to hear your plan. All parents want to know their kids are growing into responsible human beings; he probably just needed to be reassured.

[Taryn]

This guy never went to school, and he sure as hell ain't one to talk either cause he's always talkin' about the "shortcuts" and things he does at work to get more pay out of doing less work. Anybody here who is/was a student knows what they can get away with in terms of takin' off a day of school with whatever teacher without taking a hit on their grades.

just because he never got an education that does not stop him from wanting you to get one. i truly feel like he's got the best intentions and wants you to succeed in life, it may just be his approach that needs to be corrected.

[clynn]

Wow, sounds like you and your dad both talked it out in a nice reasonable fashion.

Points to both of you.

You sound like you've got your sh!t together