A changing life...?

[boobaa]

Hi!

Time for my new thread, its been a long time!

So, I turned 20 last month and still i haven't had any real relationship. I am even still a virgin, but oddly enough I feel like I need to be in a relationship first.

So I am just sick of it. Summer just hit and already I am feeling like in a routine, wether doing physical work or sitting home doing mental work or scratching my balls. So today I went to a party, it was sort of underground rock gathering, most of the people were from art schools etc, really deep. As I was standing there, alone, looking cute and all, one pretty girl stood directly beside me, I thought about approaching but then she went to her boyfriend. There also these big clubs, but somehow I have never felt attracted to them, different kind of people. Besides, people there want money and car. But I want people to want me.

Now I am facing the dilemma that there are no pretty girls who are interested in me, still single. There have been pretty girls who I have liked, but they are all taken and I am ****ing sick of this shit. I am beginning to lose trust in girls general. Why do they need to make themselves so available when clearly they are in relationship? As you probably know I have had this kind of problem before. I am not talking about girls who stand alone in bars, that is not the case at all, I am talking about girls who are really outgoing and flirty when you start to talk to them.

I also have a crush in school. We even took classes together but it never got past from really hot eye contact. We talked, but as it seems, we are both really shy and I greatly suspect she already has somebody, thats because she is on phone very often and that sometimes she is really cold. Anyway, school is over for now and I feel like I have lost my chance completely, partly because of my insecurities which involve girls having boyfriends. Oh, and I probably won't need to mention that it is so easy to talk to a girl you are not interested in, but very damn hard to speak to a girl who cuts your feet with her aura.

Now I want to know how I can face and abandon these insecurities. Right now it seems like every party I go, everyone already has boyfriends/girlfriends and I feel so alone. And even oddly enough i don't have any friends who are interested in going to clubs... Sometimes i feel that maybe I am on wrong path in life, i am searching from wrong places. But where should I look? How do you know if you have choosen the right career, right path, right people? How do you know if your life is right? I have always known what I don't want to do, but there is still a question of what should I be doing...

This sounds like a random rant, but at least I got it off from my chest. What is your opinion? Any help?

[shh!]

First of all, about the girls that you think are being flirty - I think males often misinterpret being friendly for actual flirting, and anyway, if you think they are flirting, flirt back! It would be good practice.

Now about the pretty girls - 90% of males are attracted to the same 5% of females, and then wonder why they can't get a date. Perhaps you should consider whether you should be looking at some of the "average-looking" girls.

Finally, don't go looking for nice girls in clubs. They aren't there. You are a student; get involved in student life instead. Join clubs and take some classes for fun that require you to interact with others - theater, choir, etc.

[Lipp]

Sort of in the same situation myself, except that I don't like partying much and that my problem is that I don't fall for anyone rather than they not being available.

Bleh, life.

[boobaa]

There haven't been not very many people i I have fell for either. Just this time, I wake up every day thinking about her and go to sleep every day thinking about her...
My past connections were all average. And I think current crush is very average looking in someones eyes also. I really don't look for superhot girls, thats partly because I fail to see beyond their beautiful cliche body....
However, I kept messing with a girl who is very average, and I didn't feel anything spectacular either. So i decided to just go with the flow, and guess what, I still got screwed up. Flirted for three months, kissed at last only to know that she has a boyfriend. What a waste of time.

[DoesntMatter]

You're probably too ugly to reel in any decent looking chick boobaa

[shh!]

Your bitterness and hostility may be alienating to people, booba. You need to figure out how to make yourself into a happier person. No one wants to be drug down.

Nothing that's worth having comes easy.

[boobaa]

DM and shh, I am actually a smiling person in real life and my past experiences show very well that I am good looking. You people need to get out of this forum. While me too spend quite some time in the Internet, I never take forums seriously. There is a line.

[misombra]

don't worry boobaa. you'll be okay. 20 years is still very young and you have much more opportunities and experiences ahead of you then you do behind.

don't rush life cause then you screw it all up. do what you like to do. there is no right or wrong path, you just have to do what makes you happy. it's okay that you don't know where you're going right now. you don't have to know.

at your age i was terribly depressed myself, and not even close to the same person i am now, 10 years later. you can't gauge your future on who you are right now.

don't worry so much about things. if you did have a girlfriend now, chances are it wouldn't last as you would outgrow each other in 5 years.

[lastwish]

Use your sense of humor to get girls since you're clearly a natural. So don't be shy.

[shh!]

Quote:

Originally Posted by boobaa

DM and shh, I am actually a smiling person in real life and my past experiences show very well that I am good looking. You people need to get out of this forum. While me too spend quite some time in the Internet, I never take forums seriously. There is a line.

See, this is what I mean. The comment I made to you was a genuine effort to HELP you, but you chose to respond with hostility. You might be smiling in real life, but this bitter, depressed side may be detectable to others.

[Kromat]

Quote:

Originally Posted by shh!

See, this is what I mean. The comment I made to you was a
genuine effort to HELP you, but you chose to respond with hostility. You might be
smiling in real life, but this bitter, depressed side may be detectable to others.

DM acts like he is a god send to women, his attitude is really pissing me off...
What does looks have to do with anything, people are just shallow, and have trouble accepting someone that looks different.
In the end, they treat that person better than the egotistical people that are only concerned about their looks.

P.S. DM you just said that your going into the medical field, so it's easier to pick up chicks..
Will you like this career, and is your personality ready to approach girls, if that's all that your focused on that will get you by?

I know that Real Estate will make me lots of money, if I'm driven enough, but this is possible in any career that you go into.
I think my personality will be suited for this field, so I'm giving it a shot and see what happens.
I'll be happy when I'm financial stable and have no trouble living on my own to get by, and
then have a women to have fun times with and share each others interests.

[boobaa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by shh!

See, this is what I mean. The comment I made to you was a genuine effort to HELP you, but you chose to respond with hostility. You might be smiling in real life, but this bitter, depressed side may be detectable to others.

But I wasn't being hostile. I simply described the situation, I am not into forum drama. You see it as hostile, thats fine. But I have always skipped the hostility part from your side. Have I ever complained about someones hostility? Maybe, but I don't recall it right now.


Yes, part of me is bitter, but that is actually not anything you know of. The reason lies in my insecurities. Lots of people look like egoistical cheaters to me. I already know what I have to do, but how -- I don't know. The part you described, is criticism towards those who get carried out via emotions too much.

[DoesntMatter]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kromat

DM acts like he is a god send to women, his attitude is really pissing me off...
What does looks have to do with anything, people are just shallow, and have trouble accepting someone that looks different.
In the end, they treat that person better than the egotistical people that are only concerned about their looks.

Fair enough, but what does vashtis quote have anything to do with that thought?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kromat

P.S. DM you just said that your going into the medical field, so it's easier to pick up chicks..
Will you like this career, and is your personality ready to approach girls, if that's all that your focused on that will get you by?

My personality was ready to approach girls up until junior year of high school when all inspiration went to hell in a handbasket. I would like being an anesthesiologist because I want to artfully sedate people with drugs. I can't imagine myself in many other areas

Enjoy life. And when people see you are really enjoying that, they will want to be around you. It's difficult to get a girlfriend when you can't enjoy a solitude life. That's really all I have to say. I know you have the potential to get a girlfriend.