Problems with this forum.

[Everlovin]

I have been here for a little while. Prior to becoming a member, I didn't peruse the forums..though I probably should have.

The essential problem with this forum seems to one of the blind leading the blind. People come here looking for help, many of whom appear to be desperate people who seek general advice to answer their needy-framed questions; "do you think he cheated?", "long distance for eight years and then she dumped me, HELP!" etc.. etc...etc.

Then these people try to offer advice to others.

There are also several members who have been here for three-five years or longer who behave like jaded salty dogs. Rarely do they directly answer the original poster's question. Often they shift the conversation away from the its original topic and instead express their own insecurities as they feel toward the issue at hand. Beleive it or not, this can be humorous to watch at times essentially because these members are funny like children and their soft spots become transparently obvious. Like kids, you can just "push their buttons" and they react. However, the original poster, who has not frequented the forum, is left out of the loop.

Hence, the revolving door of love forum. An online insane asylum...runned by the patients.

[Gribble]

Blah, blah, blah, blah. Every few months we get another "good guy" like yourself. Please, whatever you've got to say, we've heard it before. If you don't like this forum I'm sure there are plenty more out there that will cater to your sensitive feelings. Personally, I'd rather someone tell me I'm a dumbass because XYZ instead of just blowing a lot of empty smoke up my ass. But that's just me.

[Everlovin]

Blah, blah, blah, blah. Every few months we get another "good guy" like yourself. Please, whatever you've got to say, we've heard it before. If you don't like this forum I'm sure there are plenty more out there that will cater to your sensitive feelings. Personally, I'd rather someone tell me I'm a dumbass because XYZ instead of just blowing a lot of empty smoke up my ass. But that's just me.

^ A classic example of a reaction exhibited here on the forum. Notice how this poster projects his/her feelings of sensitivity onto me. Very cute.

[Dasein]

Blah, blah, blah, blah. Every few months we get another "good guy" like yourself. Please, whatever you've got to say, we've heard it before. If you don't like this forum I'm sure there are plenty more out there that will cater to your sensitive feelings. Personally, I'd rather someone tell me I'm a dumbass because XYZ instead of just blowing a lot of empty smoke up my ass. But that's just me.

I don't understand why it isn't acceptable to have some criticism of this forum now and again though. This forum is for new people just as much as the "regulars" and many can feel alienated do to the reaction from some members.

I am not saying that we should pander to the 40 year old men dating 15 year old girls or anything but maybe we should not jump down people's throats so quickly.

Everlovin you forgot to also mention forum mentality. When you have everyone agreeing with one another and then mauling the person who disagrees. Waiting for that now

[Indignant]

i'll be just thanking people who are brave enough to stand up for respectful order of things here. cuz i know i'll be bashed as soon as open my mouth in protest. thank you.

[Cain]

Aren't you the same guy that's leaching off of the government so you can be lazy and not have to work?

Yeah, **** you.

[Everlovin]

Aren't you the same guy that's leaching off of the government so you can be lazy and not have to work?

Yeah, **** you.

Look at this example. Here we have someone who feels bitter with me for other reasons, so instead of staying on the topic he becomes angry and dismisses it altogether.

[ecojeanne]

lol i have to agree with ya everlovin, for newbies it can be disheartening and they move on unfortunately. but as gribble says you don't have to stay or take the advice, there are tonns of other forums out there, but i do find this forum to be great fun at times and has me lmao, its not so serious all the time and i do think the people that need help do get some pretty good advice from some of the members. but at the end of the day they are not counselors and not trained to give advice however they have seen the same issues come up again and again and tend to know what the score is.

[vashti]

Aren't you the same guy that's leaching off of the government so you can be lazy and not have to work?

Yeah, **** you.

I'm taking the NCLEX in a couple of weeks.

[Cain]

I'm taking the NCLEX in a couple of weeks.

Very nice. The best of luck to you.

[Frasbee]

That's not what's wrong with this forum.

That's everything that is right with this forum!

[doppelgaenger]

Yeah, that's how it is here. What can you do about it though?

[vashti]

Very nice. The best of luck to you.

Thank you.

What kind of car do you drive?

[Cain]

Thank you.

What kind of car do you drive?

Cavalier.

Wanna hop in the back seat with me?

[Aeradalia]

blind leading the blind.
Then these people try to offer advice to others.
three-five years or longer who behave like jaded salty dogs.
Often they shift the conversation away from the its original topic and instead express their own insecurities as they feel toward the issue at hand.
An online insane asylum...runned by the patients.

Yes this forum is full of people who have problems in certain situations... but they also have valuable experience in other situations.

I've read some of the advice given by those that were 'wrong.' However, the other posters make it a point to not only warn the OP that this person is wrong but to demonstrate why - break it down for the OP.

And while one person watches their 'bridges burn' they can at the very least warn another to 'not do the same things I have done.' So this is valuable too.

The only problem with this forum... really... is that you have to look a little harder to find those valuable tidbits of information... often 'reading between the lines' to find it. But I, for one, have learned so much from those that are knowledgeable and even from those that are fooling themselves.

Of all the places I have visited... this forum is by far the most useful because of all the raw information it offers - so many different views to any given scenario. Its a collection of shared experiences that you can filter through and find answers to your questions... and even learn something new - see from a perspective you never though about before... impossible to do in the linear Q/A method.