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Thread: Why do men want to control their wives or girlfriends?

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    Why do men want to control their wives or girlfriends?

    Okay so I've been with my boyfriend almost 4 years and he said if I wanna marry him I have to live by his rules. I just need some advice on why, he's really possessive over me which is I guess okay but why does he wanna run my life??

    Why do men get violent when they feel like they are losing control ? why do they try to scare them into staying with them,but they ain't treating them right?and why do they treat their friends more better?

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    Better question still: why do you stay with someone who behaves like this?
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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    Quote Originally Posted by **xXTannyXx** View Post
    Okay so I've been with my boyfriend almost 4 years and he said if I wanna marry him I have to live by his rules. I just need some advice on why, he's really possessive over me which is I guess okay but why does he wanna run my life??

    Why do men get violent when they feel like they are losing control ? why do they try to scare them into staying with them,but they ain't treating them right?and why do they treat their friends more better?
    Because women like you date these assholes

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    By and large, the men who behave like this do so because the woman allows it to continue. Thing is, it's so incredibly easy to stop him hurting you like this - all you have to do is leave.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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    Nice job in generalizing ALL men.

    Think about that for a second

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    OP instead of saying why do men do this, speak for your own man and say why does my bf do this.Most men are not like that at all.

    He does it because he is an asshole and he knows you will let him get away with it. Most women would have ran a mile from him so ask yourself why are you still there?
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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    Quote Originally Posted by **xXTannyXx** View Post
    Okay so I've been with my boyfriend almost 4 years and he said if I wanna marry him I have to live by his rules. I just need some advice on why, he's really possessive over me which is I guess okay but why does he wanna run my life??
    Be really careful. You may lose yourself and your identity. Your description of the patterns of behaviour of your boyfriend is common in some people who have feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem. They overcompensate by exerting their power over their partner to boost their own confidence but it can be destructive and often ends up destroying the confidence of their partner. Potential recipe for disaster. Everything should be shared. No-one has the right to lay down all the rules. Your partner should trust you as trust is the foundation of any relationship.

    Quote Originally Posted by **xXTannyXx** View Post
    Why do men get violent when they feel like they are losing control ? why do they try to scare them into staying with them,but they ain't treating them right?and why do they treat their friends more better?
    I hope you are not describing the same guy. If you are then it could be serious problems. If you add this violent nature to an insecure, possessive and controlling character that wants to dominate then you have someone who fits the profile of a potential perpetrator of domestic violence.

    Sorry if I sound negative. But feel I have to express an opinion from a male perspective.

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    A healthy relationship should be 100% equal. Me and my bf joke about who wears the pants all the time or whos the boss etc but we both KNOW we love and respect each other equally and we are a team. If you dont feel equal to him or if you are afraid-its time to leave.

    Look up abusive relationships. Perhaps you are brainwashed, perhaps he has told you all men are like this and this is how a relationship should be but hes wrong. I suggest you walk away from him and get some counselling to help you heal and set your standards higher in future

    Good luck
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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    MEN don't behave like this. Abusive, controlling men behave like this. Get out before it's too late.
    May the wind always be at your back and the sun upon your face. And may the winds of destiny carry you aloft to dance with the stars

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    big ego + testosterone = your boyfriend.

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