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Thread: Nothing to heal me

  1. #1
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    Nothing to heal me

    I have been broken up with by every man I have ever been with - via email and text, face to face, etc, with maybe one or two exceptions. I never meet anyone without the internet, and those end up being one time encounters (as in meet once and then never hear from that person again). I'm 43, I live alone. People think I'm gay because I've never been married to anyone. I want to be to someone, but no one wants to commit to me. I feel like no one wants me and I'm starting to believe it. The only guys who ask me out are losers - no job, no money, no future.

    I tried putting myself in interests. I tried trying out for parts in plays and movies and whatnot, I never get a part. No one wants me there either. They pick women who have more experience, but you can't get experience without getting a part.

    I have a lot of friends and acquaintance, but I don't meet people through them. I had one woman friend tell me she wouldn't friend me on Facebook because that would take away from her chances of meeting men.

    I'm not useless, I have a lot to offer others. But the guys would rather have trashy girls or someone who isn't me at least.

    I have become a bitter person thinking about all the guys who have dumped me, rebounded and married the next one who came along, and then got divorced a few years later. Hold my head high? For what? For more disappointments? If someone shows any interest in me I feel like they will find some reason or excuse to dump me eventually. I won't even risk trying to get out there, the last time I did that I was rejected 4 years ago and that cut me to the bone and I never got over it.

    What to do? Go forth and mind my own business, cry in my bedroom under the covers.

  2. #2
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    Cmon, you got rejected once and no trying again for 4 years? Too much Sensitivty is not key to happiness. So get over rejection and try again. We guys get rejected so much but we still try.

    I got dumped too by all the girls I have dated. But then again I always did a lot of mistakes and those girls wasnt so good anyway.

    So you should revaluate your priorities and then do first thing first. cause theres not so much time left anymore to waste. Life is too short to protect yourself from dissapointment if you get rejected. By not trying you already reject yourself.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  3. #3
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    Dont be desperate, you can still have a lot of chance

    Like the above sayings, you actually have to re-examine your past experience with some mistake you do to your past partner. Somebody decide to leave you meaning there must be problem between you and him bt you cant change him bt at least yourself.

    Now you have no more time to think too much, take action and try another new relationship. Hope you can be better~

  4. #4
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    Read up on the laws of attraction & understand that the universe doesn't process the words no or not. For example if you say send me a guy who is not a loser, the universe drops the word not & guess what you get? Yup.

    I can understand your frustration. I didn't meet my husband until I was 39. What I threw out there is send me a sexy guy with a wicked sense of humor, a solid work ethic who is strong enough to let me be weak. I met then married a Marine veteran.

    Since you have friends & other things going for you, ask a dear friend to give you an honest evaluation. Do not ask the shallow woman who wouldn't friend you on FB because it would allegedly diminish her chances of meeting men. If at middle age she's using social media to meet men, she's probably not the kind of friend you want anyway.

  5. #5
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    Hi there, according to me, you need to control your mind and set a goal in your life to move forward so that people can see and one day they will surely accept that you can do great things in life. Don't give priority to anyone that what they are thinking about you. You can also take the help of professional who are expert in motivating and providing guidance to move positively in life. I have heard good reviews about Martine-voyance.com from my friend. I think you can take help of them.

  6. #6
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    I've been focusing on my career a lot in the last few years, I have done some good things with it. I am fighting hard to make it and I work hard at all of it as a teacher. I'm getting closer to a full time teaching job. I have long since learned that coworkers are not friends, the internet is a lousy way to meet people, and I have become a very introverted person. All I do is focus myself on my work to make me feel like I am doing something, I want to someday move to Florida and be teaching in a boarding school. And I feel I am getting closer to it.

  7. #7
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    Healing takes too long, I fell off the wagon, first drink since 97,, self medicating.
    people say it don't work,, but the pain seems to be less after each time.
    I know the pain is bad at 19 and 61....you are young, and too young in my book.

    MortensOrchid,,,I'm not suggesting alcohol,, but do you have any you can spare?
    Last edited by Old Guy; 20-04-18 at 09:03 AM.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by MortensOrchid View Post
    I've been focusing on my career a lot in the last few years, I have done some good things with it. I am fighting hard to make it and I work hard at all of it as a teacher. I'm getting closer to a full time teaching job. I have long since learned that coworkers are not friends, the internet is a lousy way to meet people, and I have become a very introverted person. All I do is focus myself on my work to make me feel like I am doing something, I want to someday move to Florida and be teaching in a boarding school. And I feel I am getting closer to it.
    I own a business, and the problem I have is all the time I'm working, in my head, I am yelling at her for hurting me,
    I just wish I could forget and go back to being happy alone,
    Young lady MortensOrchid,,,I am not taking away from your grief, I truly feel for you, I heard an old song the other day, Neil Diamond Solitary Man. To me love is not a small word, and I am especially bothered by ones like you knew who treat Love as a mood.

  9. #9
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    I think what has hurt me the most out of all things is the fact that it just keeps happening over and over and I get conflicting messages. One person told me that the idiots who dump me don't deserve me and they end up rightfully with the trashy girls because that's what they deserve. That may be true but then why do I end up with these losers to begin with? I wanted to be an actor at some point, no one will give me a part and I gave up. I wanted to be a black belt once, one of the sensais said he wanted to meet with me and said he thinks of me as an entitled person who thinks that they are something that they are not, mind my Ps & Qs and behave myself. There were other things he said (things I had done and said in the past), but I have talent that is being wasted. I went home and cried for about two hours after that. And I never went back to karate again. He wrote me an email saying he was concerned I heard his criticism and not his praise, he thinks I have what it takes but I have to leave things behind. He said I'm welcome to come back anytime. The rejection I mentioned, for some reason, really hit me hard and I felt like an idiot for even trying. But I was an adult about it, I erased his number from my phone and we'd never speak a word again.

    I feel like I am not wanted by people, they think they are so important and they put down my self esteem because it makes them feel good about themselves. I never meet anyone without the internet and it's usually some one time encounter (as in you meet, have an evening and then you never hear a word again from them). I'm alone and not good enough to do certain things, I can't have things that others can/do because of that. No one wants me, and I have to accept that.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by MortensOrchid View Post
    I think what has hurt me the most out of all things is the fact that it just keeps happening over and over and I get conflicting messages. One person told me that the idiots who dump me don't deserve me and they end up rightfully with the trashy girls because that's what they deserve. That may be true but then why do I end up with these losers to begin with? I wanted to be an actor at some point, no one will give me a part and I gave up. I wanted to be a black belt once, one of the sensais said he wanted to meet with me and said he thinks of me as an entitled person who thinks that they are something that they are not, mind my Ps & Qs and behave myself. There were other things he said (things I had done and said in the past), but I have talent that is being wasted. I went home and cried for about two hours after that. And I never went back to karate again. He wrote me an email saying he was concerned I heard his criticism and not his praise, he thinks I have what it takes but I have to leave things behind. He said I'm welcome to come back anytime. The rejection I mentioned, for some reason, really hit me hard and I felt like an idiot for even trying. But I was an adult about it, I erased his number from my phone and we'd never speak a word again.

    I feel like I am not wanted by people, they think they are so important and they put down my self esteem because it makes them feel good about themselves. I never meet anyone without the internet and it's usually some one time encounter (as in you meet, have an evening and then you never hear a word again from them). I'm alone and not good enough to do certain things, I can't have things that others can/do because of that. No one wants me, and I have to accept that.
    MortensOrchid,,,I don't see how any rational thinking person can enter a relationship with out full support of each others dreams, there is a frog for every princess, just consider his motives before you kiss him.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Old Guy View Post
    MortensOrchid,,,I don't see how any rational thinking person can enter a relationship with out full support of each others dreams, there is a frog for every princess, just consider his motives before you kiss him.
    That makes a lot of sense man. If we both don't support each other dreams then what the hell are we doing together? The relationship should have one direction otherwise two just drift apart. Spending time together is great but in a long run it should have deeper meaning, like going in same way, being one team.
    Last edited by pcmaster; 23-04-18 at 01:56 AM.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  12. #12
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    I feel better tonight.
    I sent her an email with well, an ultimatum, I will be treated right or I am blocking her for ever.
    she probably won't read it, but I feel better.

  13. #13
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    cheating spouse

    I am Anjinart by name,if you need hacking into a cheating spouse phone,email,Facebook,bank statements etc,you really need the. blackhatdemonic
    art gmail com. helped get to the bottom line before i could pursue a law suit on my husband who cheated on me for so many years. She provided me with physical evidence by hacking into my husbands facebook account and was able to monitor his call. Thanks to him

  14. #14
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    When the world doesn't like who you are, then you have to change. Figure out why men are not attracted to you and why your friends are embarrassed for having you on their facebook.

  15. #15
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    I have been broken up with by every man I have ever been with - via email and text, face to face, etc,
    What a coincidence! So have I!!! So have most people!!

    I've never had a man die on me as a way of ending my relationship, so...

    I vote for just living your life and making it way more interesting so that your vibe piques the interest of someone who wants to bask in your sunshine.
    People treat you the way they feel about you

    If you choose to remain with someone who doesn't treat you well, you cease being the victim and become the volunteer.

    ~Derrick Jaxn -- look him up

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